I don't know what the hell's going on.

Feb 17, 2005 00:40

Well I don't exactly know what it is that I need to say ( Read more... )

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Comments 8

rocksouldoubt February 17 2005, 14:31:43 UTC
maybe if you took up boxing or something physical where you hit things you could rid yourself of rage?
i know what you mean tired of this place. sometimes i hide in my room. like literally under the covers so i can pretend i'm asleep if my roommates come in. . .

i think that everyone knows you have talent steven...and if they dont then they're blind and too ignorant to see. i see it. i know you have a chance if you just work hard. and i think a lot more people than you realize the egos that exist here...but i dont think anyone actually thinks they're that good or going anywhere...and if they do, then i'm an idiot and i take it back. . .

i hate when you are upset because i never get a chance to see you but i dont really know how to ask people to hang out anymore since i am such a ...well basic closet introvert..

mmpf.
i'm sorry.
i'm not helping
...i can listen real good if you want to meet up sometime...

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steven_mageven February 18 2005, 05:20:39 UTC
Actually Shawn and I have made arrangements to start working out frequently which might help the anger... Also in that line, I've been prescribed physio from my Doctor.. :(
And I've been spending a lot more time on my own in my room... I've got a wingback chair and I sit in it, lit by candlelight and brood on the internet. It's fun.

And I'm happy I got to see you if even for a couple of seconds today. it's always nice to see you :)
And you did help. You wrote which means you care, which means a lot to me.

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wendeh February 17 2005, 15:53:56 UTC
Maybe this isn't going to help in any way, but I want to note a few things:

*At least you're doing a degree you (presumably) enjoy, instead of some generic BA or something that would be even more useless in the end. There's so many jobs out there, especially in the entertainment field, that require sh*t when it comes to university education. And hey, if you're still interested in teaching, there are private schools in this world that don't even require a B of Ed to get hired as long as you have the expertise.
*I'm wondering if the people in your program who will end up not succeeding in the field in the end don't have the drive to actually go places where there is a demand for those skills? To actually pursue it with fervent aggression? I think you do.
*Letting your aggression boil is not gooooood but everybody knows that. Sometimes it just feels better to be moody for awhile but don't let it take you over.

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steven_mageven February 18 2005, 05:30:41 UTC
Thanks for the notes :)
I read them and thought, damn sensible big sister!
But yeah...
The first two points. I know... but... bah... I don't feel or remember that way all the time!
Third note. I think that I learned this bottle everything up trick as a tactic to avoid disputes with mom. It's just easier to take it in and avoid the fight. And now I've been doing that for what... 7-10 years and it's all starting to come back out. And I still do it... It's far easier to just pretend to let things go then to confront people.

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miffmuffin February 17 2005, 17:27:44 UTC
some say that university is less about the degree and more about the life experience. you have not learned only about theatre while at acadia. you're wiser and more mature for taking on everything that you have over the past few years. and, it's just money. we need it, but luckily it's not everything.

I hope you feel better soon.
love karah

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steven_mageven February 18 2005, 05:36:20 UTC
Mwah!
Thanks :) But I still say...

stupid money!

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nametakentwice February 20 2005, 07:45:03 UTC
You have mad acting/comedy/music skillz, and you're a people person, so I know you'll do well.

Everyone gets emotional at times. Some get angry, some get depressed, etc. Especially at this point in life - the quarter-life crisis. You get towards the end of your degree and wonder what the heck you're going to do next, or if you know you wonder if it'll happen. (I know you have another year, but you have been there for 4, so I expect it's starting to kick in for you anyway.)

I, conveniently, don't have to figure out what I'm going to do post-university for another 2 years, what with doing another degree. Now that's procrastination;)

Anyway, I'm sure you'll go all sorts of places and do tons of exciting things:)

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raffleman February 23 2005, 16:12:08 UTC
YOU NEED TO CALL ME IF YOU WANT TO GO SEE JON AT THE AIRPORT TODAY! WE WANT TO LEAVE AROUND 3:00ish!!!

680 8646

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