today i was driving to my apartment office to officially sign the lease for our new place, i passed a bar and i thought to myself "soon enough," i thought about how i would be turning 20 in september, and wait a min, im turning 19...wtf. i realized in so many ways my birthdays have been confused on a certain level so i always feel a year older to ( Read more... )

separate yourself from lies ( Read more... )

In the night we were stripped of our faces by the dark sky, our lips dimly lit by the cigarettes burning from the tips of our fingers. Although we were strangers for the most part to each other, we spoke with open hearts, ourselves becoming our words, and our lips becoming mangled with the others dispite the fact in plain sight we were barely

i make myself sick with this non-sense i put myself through, on the one hand i have every right to be picky, i have dealt with enough of my family treating me like shit to the point that if i am going to let anyone in my life i have to know they are good. i need to be sure they are going to be there for me ( Read more... )

i make choices for myself, i do things for myself. i find ways to make myself happy. i dont need to justify the fact that i dont have a void, but in all honesty i dont feel bad that jon wood is going to die alone cause he is a stuborn bitter old man at the age of 18. its whatever.

i finally have a life of my own.

thats all i need.

so after a very long weekend, i have a very strange dream. last night i dreamt of this boy i know who i think is absolutely adorable, i love every thing about him from his smile, to the way he hugs me when we say good bye. i love talking to him and i know i could talk forever to him if he'd let me ( Read more... )

today was a strange day. i had my manager review done the other day, i knew it wasnt going to be the best. at some point this week i realized that i have lost sight of who i am. i was watching my self chain smoke out of my car window as i drove home, thinking about how fucked up i had been the night before. i dont know what crossed my mind first, ( Read more... )

dec 7th 2005:

perplexed beats: hdfjkhhkasgh
muppetNAMBLA55: dkfskdgf
perplexed beats: good youre still on!
muppetNAMBLA55: <3 ( Read more... )

today i bought some bitching aviators. really i just needed sunglasses. im kinda dissapointed that they arent gold ( Read more... )

last night nick took me to the beach. i didn't really take him for someone to be spontaneous but then out of no where he surprises me ( Read more... )