cartoons comfort my stuffed head each day of the week. i use miles and miles of tissue, take pills and pills, think and think. the cats are even sneezing! oh fall you are truly here, throwing your sickness all over the place
stuffing my head and spraying dust into my throat. i'm hot i'm cold i'm going to watch more television

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each cover letter and copy of résumé sent out without reply is like a black shadow that just won't disappear no matter how much light there is. what am i trying to say, that i am great and unemployment should light like the sun, burn into something? am i thinking they can all see through the computerized text illuminating how i am unsure of myself?
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the leaves seem to be crisping instead of changing color, but maybe it is in my head. my eyes are very itchy so instead of writing about nothing i'll just write nothing instead

since things have to change i want everything to change. i want a hair cut, a wardrobe, a new bus schedule. i'll go to a new place and make new friends, clean new floors. i feel like everything is out of control anyway can't i make the cats panic, too? we'll all worry in bed together about everything and lie on each others' bellies.

i wish the air ( Read more... )

today the book store will close forever at ten a.m. i am scheduled to go in at twelve and clean. i will deliver my resume to lush and then go to work for the last time, plug in the vacuum and wonder, why haven't i applied for unemployment yet? i probably could have done that yesterday. i'll have plenty of free time anyway. maybe i won't even wonder ( Read more... )

the weather has been beautiful, leaving a dull sense of hope in my head. it throbs and thinks grass is theraputic, the sun showering gold on the world, things are ok, they are dully hopeful. i will set my sights on cool nights, changing foliage, halloween. what should i pretend to be in october?

i have been subsisting on cookies and muffins today. ( Read more... )

i walked out into the hurricane or tropical storm today. tree branches in the street, big enough for me to climb into. big enough for city workers to use a chainsaw to cut it into pieces to move it. i am trying to watch tv.

my husband bought me sunflowers today. he is at the hospital with his mother. a malcontent would say they felt weird so they ( Read more... )

it is only natural that i do not only face unemployment, but that a temp comes to work and we cannot seem to get along. being stopped by five customers on the way to lunch, sexually harassed, scowled at and pitied. this spells: i shouldn't have let myself run out of citalopram.

i have a doctor's appointment this friday. other than that i have cried ( Read more... )

the weather reminds me of the scent of grass drying under the sun. the trees outside of the window smell warm. summer has settled in with its sun and thunderstorms; i feel exactly the same as that.

i was brought into the receiving room yesterday to find each manager standing solemnly. "bad news" informed our fearless leader, "no one bid on us". i ( Read more... )