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be better, 2015.
2014 was the kinda year that i just got through i guess. it wasnt filled with very special moments, neither did i crash. it was not the worse, neither was it the best.
2015 was always going to be a year of great albeit intimidating transitioning for me. i just didnt think even the counting down from 2014 to 2015 was gonna be such a meh transition. i ( Read more... ) -
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anticipation, n.ive always only ever hovered in the grey area. i'd have someone come along and tell me oh, you got attached. and i'd wait- for my body to react, for the neurons in my brain to spark. as if im supposed to hurt or cry or be angry or feel something specific. id just wait with tightness from my throat down to my gut, never knowing how ( Read more... ) -
none of this makes sense.
on monday, everything felt clear, though saying it out was one of the hardest things ive had to do. but everyone's telling me now that i did wrong. youre not enough, im too much.
now idk what i did, am doing, am gonna do. i dont deserve to let you down so many times over.
i think i should just steer clear from boys. meh.
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it's not fair. i had to grow up and out of the self-pity parties i used to throw myself. but im surrounded by those who do and i cant say a thing. i want to help to make them feel better so that i can feel better yknow?
