i'm in a slump lately. i feel like i'm not doing well at work. i miss eric like crazy. i just want everything back to normal. i miss 247 and all the kids there. I miss eric so much. i feel like this time away from him has been so hard but i feel like we can only grow closer through all this. im nervous that he's going to come back and not want to ( Read more... )

He left. he's on a plane for japan. i've never been sad like this. it's weird. i just got used to him really being around and being my bf. now he's gone for a month. i feel stupid. todays my first day at 89. i'm overwhelmed. i'll be fine. i'll be able to do this. i know what i'm doing. i got transferred there for a reason. i can do this.

overwhelmed. eric leaves tomorrow and i've never had to deal with that. i haven't had a bf in years let alone a guy i feel like this about. i'm sitting here staring at him now (creepy maybe) but i'm so sad that he will be leaving me tomorrow morning. it's gonna break my heart to watch him go on that plane and not be able to see him for a month ish ( Read more... )

Im in a funk. I have a whole in my leg, hurts like a bitch. Im transferring stores and am all but excited about it. And my bf is going away for a month. I thought Id be relieved for him to be gone for a few weeks so I can really concentrate on work. That sounds wrong but I dont want any distractions. But now I think I need him here cuz I feel like ( Read more... )

fuck. that's how i have to start just fuck. i have so much fuckin debt i don't know what to do with. i constantly am hitting decline on my phone because people are calling me for not paying my bills. yet i hate paying bills. yet all i wanna do is shop and go out and have fun with my friends and do fun things. i'm just overwhelmed. i need to get it ( Read more... )

I will not let a man control my emotions!

i feel like all i write about is guys. like i meet someone, don't wanna fuck it up, and then somehow i do. and idk if any of these guys are "the one" but i keep meeting them and it keeps not working out and i get sad and then i try again. and everytime i meet somebody i sit here and think, is this one the one? will this guy be different? will i ( Read more... )

today has been a doozie. flat tire. almost late for work. got a notice on the door saying be quiet or else. herman deleted me from fb. i feel alone. not gonna start my period anytime soon.

sometimes i just need to write. not about anything particular, just write. it gets everythingoff my head. i don't think this even gets read anymore but that's okay. i need to do it for me, nobody else. i feel betrayed by people lately. i feel left out and alone and i haven't felt this way in a long time. i know i'm not but i feel like this. nobody ( Read more... )

Same story different day. I met someone. Been there said that. He's great. I'm sure I have also said that before. But he's different. Same story. Could see myself really falling for this guy. I should just stop talking. I met a guy, last Thursday, named omar at dive bar club thing that janaira and I are trying out. He was super sweet that first ( Read more... )