so i really think things might get better. i dont want to jynx it but im really really happy. all i ever wanted was to just be with him again and be happy. i want to make him happy like i used to. i dont want to upset him and i don't want to drive him crazy like i have been. i think we lost what mattered the most in all of the fighting but maybe ( Read more... )

im so sick of going through this my by myself. its a constant battle and i have no one to talk to about it. he just leaves me alone all the time and its so unfair. you dont do this to someone you love. you just dont.

i dont think ive cried this much my entire life. i cry at least once every day. i feel so empty and alone half the time and the other half im walking on egg shells to keep him with me. i dont know what happened but hes not the same. i used to be his everything and he used to be mine. now he couldn't care less about me. its so easy for him. i wish ( Read more... )

If I knew this was how it'd turn out I would have never let it get this bad. I'm so numb now, numb to everything. I don't trust anyone, I don't laugh anymore, and I hate my life. I feel like I'm living a bad dream and I just want to wake up.

I wish more than anything that I could go back and relive the past two years because I'm so not ready for it to be over. I'm not ready to move on I'm not ready to see or hear about him with someone else, I'm not ready for that day to come soooo much sooner than i think it's going to.. because i know it will and i know it will hurt like hell. I'm ( Read more... )

haha so I was deleting a lot of old crap I wrote about in this journal that was private meaning no one could read it except for me and this is what I found ( Read more... )

Well I never pray but tonight I'm on my knees.

* I love the way you laugh and how I only hear it when you truly think something is funny which makes it so much more meaningful ( Read more... )

I'm still scared of the dark ( Read more... )

I was born and somewhat raised in Newport Michigan. It’s a small run down town off of Lake Eerie with a population of 6,000. I have always had a relentless and extraordinary love for being near the water. It’s the feeling and scents of fresh air rolling in off the lake, the constant restlessness and inability to keep still, and the large amounts of ( Read more... )