when i close my eyes, my face becomes the face of a clock, with the gears turning in my skull (often times they grind unpleasantly). my dad imagines the inner-workings of his mind as a mechanical process. at cafes, he dislodges his skull and finely tunes each mechanism/part of his brain ( Read more... )

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every cell in my body resonates when listening to this.

resolutions for 2011: suspend the fear of other's perceptions during creative processes & do them more often, get involved in a local environmental justice movement, open myself up to people outside of my core (family, close friends, boyfriend), not be ashamed of my body's unusual/undesirable proportions or my odd manner of speaking, not worry ( Read more... )

fuck you 2010

bring it on 2011

goodbye sweet dog.

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remembering there's living breathing flesh and a heart beating under this armor i recently constructed for myself. berkeley has taken a toll on my sanity, but sometimes i emerge for air ( Read more... )

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last night after finishing the last of six assignments this week, while listening to kraftwerk, i coldly assessed everything that i tucked into the back of my mind, the things that leave me unsettled at night. how i'll never be ready to lose my grandparents/parents/siblings or anyone else close to me (is anyone?). all the ways i hurt and betrayed ( Read more... )

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the water got so cold
and you do lose what you don't hold