im so tired of being worried about certain things. im tired of wondering what other people are thinking or feeling. im tired of guessing whats really going on. i want people to be honest and up front with me. i want them to trust me when they need to. i want to be able to focus on any given task without my thoughts drifting. im trying to look up ( Read more... )

making myself stand out of the way to watch someone i care about make a mistake is one of the more difficult situations ive yet to find myself in. no matter how much mutual love there is between friends, if theyre not willing to accept the well intentioned perspective i want to give them, theres nothing i can do but watch the train wreck that will ( Read more... )

Main Entry: worthless ( Read more... )

its hot. i love living upstairs; its great. i mean, jay had the room first and he played drums so my parents had the room sound proofed. thats good for two reasons; they cant get mad at me for playing my music too loud plus its practically impossible to hear anything from more than 5 feet outside my door. i love it ( Read more... )

whats wrong with me. im not doing anything important. im so incredibly tired and i cant see straight. yet here i am. not going to bed. idk what it is. my bed is right there *points over there* and i just cant seem to force myself to get into it and close my eyes. even though i know that i have to be up at 6, lyns coming over at 7 to make breakfast ( Read more... )

so ive been sitting here for a few minutes just staring at the blank entry space. i dont know what i want to say. i guess im only updating because i have a little bit of lj guilt for ignoring it for so long. ive been reading and keeping up with my friends, but ive been neglecting my own. i apologize ( Read more... )

ok so nothing very exciting happened today. i was out by the pool listening to my ipod and getting a tan (which i was in desperate need of) when a really cute maintenence guy smiled at me. that was about all worth telling and i doubt anyone cares. to be quite honest, im not sure i care ( Read more... )

yea, so im in florida again. yay. i always feel like such a whiner when i complain that im on vacation. it really is nice here. we have a beautiful condo that my dad has worked hard and been generous enough to buy for the family. we eat at great, expensive restaurants everyday. theres a gorgeous private beach about fifty feet to my left and 7 ( Read more... )

oh im so sorry, ive completely been neglecting my journal thingy. probably because im not all angry and sad like i was before. things still arent perfect by any means, but right now im pretty ok ( Read more... )

well i think everythings ok for now. christmas was alright i suppose. trip to chicago with my parents and brother; i lived. new years; nothing crazy but i had a good time. the holidays were okay but i got to spend a lot of time with my friends and i used every minute of break. tomorrow is school; i think i shall run far away and never come back. ( Read more... )