Due to certain circumstances, this journal is now

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New journal. 
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Can you please stop being such a major douche?

My sermon of the day:

Just because you're busy doesn't mean you have to be a dick.

This is for my love, Kelly Marteney.

( Wit is educated insolence. )

As my mother and I were watching television tonight, an ad for RAW came on, highlighting the finer aspects of the world of professional wrestling.

My mother asked me "What about this is appealing?"

I returned with, "It's called middle America."

She countered, "Then what are we?"

I looked her directly in the eyes and responded, "Superior."

Tonight I am wondering, intensely, why the best things happen to the worst people.

Discuss.

My mom is the most beautiful woman in the world.  Looking at her makes me realize that love is real, because even though she's not 25 with miles of tanned, taut, and tantalizing skin glistening with promises of a wildly fascinating but short-lived obsession, she is beauty at it's purest form.  She is gentle and stern and stubborn and contained ( Read more... )

Remind me to just never lend anyone any money ever ever ever again.  I am CONSTANTLY fucked over by stupid selfish bitches and I'm so tired of it.  Do I just have a giant sign plastered across my forehead demanding people to rape my asshole ( Read more... )

I leave in about 4 hours.

Oh God.