App
Character: Kamijou Hiroki
Series: Junjou Romantica
Character Age: 29
Job: Visiting Lecturer on Undead Literature
Canon: Junjou Romantica consists of three mostly separate storylines, each centered around the relationship of a particular couple. Kamijou Hiroki is one of the leads of the ‘Junjou Egoist’ plot, and when he fled a disastrous attempted seduction of his childhood best friend to sulk in a park, the last thing he expected to find was the real love of his life. Cue about six years of more dramatic rom-com communication mishaps and emotional breakdowns than you can shake a stick at.
Hiroki prides himself on being calm and collected, and therefore usually comes across as the opposite - over-serious, grouchy and extremely sensitive. He yells and has a tendency to talk to himself when he’s flustered (which is often), and is so aggressive and passionate about his work that his students call him “Demon Kamijou” - interpreting a story from the wrong perspective in his class is a good way to get an eraser between the eyes. But as much as he protests, he’s a genuine, caring young man who just wants everyone to respect him and his literature.
Sample Post:
This isn’t exactly what I was expecting when I signed on to do a lecture series in America. From the moment I arrived I have been harassed and insulted. The call for papers called it the Conference On Undead Dialogues - nobody said there were going to be actual zombies involved! And when I finally made it through the swamp and found the lecture hall, they had also changed the name of my paper. It was supposed to be ‘Queering the Vampire in Modern Japan’ but now it’s listed as ‘I Vant To Suck Your...’ T-that sort of thing isn’t- it’s too blunt! I’m not giving a lecture on that and I don’t care how many arms I have to twist off!
And that's not even half of it! I mean, most students are brainless deadbeats, right? But not this literally. These guys are falling all over themselves! I tried to lead a discussion but they couldn’t identify simple themes, they don’t even know what a metaphor is and they have been vandalizing the books. I may not be an expert on British literature but any idiot can see that "scenes of bone-crunching zombie mayhem" don't belong in 'Pride and Prejudice'! …Although I admit I’m not as sure about the intrinsic literary value of ‘How To Survive The Zombie Apocalypse'. They really seem to have a grudge against that one, judging by the stains. But that’s beside the point! …And that student’s arm is beside his book-bag. Put that back in its socket or I’ll pick it up and beat you with it, you wool for- Gah! That’s disgusting! Ordinary students I can handle but I didn’t sign up for this. I’m just going to start backing out slowly and hope none of them notice. They can find someone else to teach this class of the damned!
Keep your cool, Kamijou. Are you going to let a horde of the ravening undead overcome your man’s pride? …W-well, if I have to hide, at least I found a library. Books are always comforting. Or they used to be. I’m a little worried about the ones here. I think a Murakami tried to feel me up a few minutes ago and the dictionaries seem to be getting, ah, restless. And what’s with these weird public awareness signs? ‘Remember Your Camp Rules! No’ um, ah - ‘No sex, especially in or with the library!’ What the hell is that supposed to mean? T-that was one time! Ah… I’m really getting out of control. Alright, no more complaining. I’m going to crawl out from under this table and march right out that door! Those goons will be sorry they ever messed with me! Just let me shove this stack of books over here… Wait, this one's different from the others-
D-damn it, graphic novel or not, that kind of image just isn't right! I don’t usually say things like this but think of the children!
Voting was here.
In: 54
Out: 4
93.1%
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