Had lunch with the mom today.  She had a lot to say about my lack of care for myself.  I never spend money on me.  I don't look like I'm taken care of.  I realized how I get this super guilty feeling when I spend money on myself.  I don't know why.  The money's going somewhere and I dont' know where.  I HAVE TO START TAKING CARE OF ME!  There ( Read more... )

Lessons from home:

I've lost a good part of my relax.  I'm always so serious, so tense.  Being back around my brother and sisters opened my eyes to how people can be so comfortable being themselves. I don't dance like nobody's watching. lol  
I haven't figured it out yet.  Maybe it's a hormonal defect and it's not really me.  Maybe I should just ( Read more... )

Hello Family and Friends ( Read more... )

Calgary Stampede week has finally passed.  Friday Breakfast party for 500 heads + open bar, 14 hour days, 4am start times, pot after pot of Chili and Beef Barley soup, record breaking days, record breaking nights, arriving at work as the night bartenders leave, leaving work as the night bartenders arrive, 148 large trays of oven roasted maple ( Read more... )

I almost lost a finger on my "day off".  I got called in to work, being promised to be done by 1pm at the latest.  Busy day as always.  I was doing my final cleanup when the sous chef asked me to go back online to help the cooks with an unexpected rush of orders.  Busy, busy, busy...  wiping my cutting board clean when a knife placed in a wrong ( Read more... )

Imagine building a tower of playing cards ten feet tall and fucking up the placement of the last two cards causing the whole shitty thing to crumble.  So ends my first week of training as a Saucier.  It's a lot harder than my previous station and requires a lot more patience and efficiency.  The week went well but ended in a Caesar dressing ( Read more... )

I participated in a celebrity charity hors d'oeuvres competition at the Telus Convention Centre this weekend.  The plates were judged based on uniqeness, presentation and flavour. The Metropollitan Grill presented the Ahi Tuna Slider. (Cubes of Sashimi grade Ahi Tuna tossed with fresh avocado, chopped shallots, lime squeeze, sesame seeds and ginger ( Read more... )

Everyday I wake up at 6am and hit snooze. Then I wake up at 6:08 and hit snooze. Then I wake up at 6:22am and get ready for work. I call Associated taxi, pack my kitchen gear and knives, put on jeans and a shirt, brush my teeth, comb my hair, wash my face, go back to bed, cuddle for a bit. Front buzzer goes signifying the arrival of my taxi. ( Read more... )

I've been lucky enough to not have to deal with racism first hand. Being a female asian usually works to my favour. It never really crosses my mind as something that happens ALL THE TIME. There are a lot of ignorant people out there ( Read more... )

The terror of blankness

The sad truth of truth

We are all nothing

We are inconsequential proof

The meaningless being

Aware but obtuse