there are no wolves inside you. if there were you'd be dead. why not try acting like an adult human?

"I say we get a good night's sleep, meet back here about 9:00, have a light breakfast, kill that asshole before noon, then day drink til we pass out. Who's with me?"

-Cat Waller, Vampire Hunter

when i was a kid i never dreamed that i would have my own computer, that would be connected to the entire world, and that with a thing called twitter i could wish mamie van doren a happy birthday. just too cool.

of course i never thought i'd have to deal with morons who would say things like 'awesomesauce', 'for the win', and 'y'all' either...

i just bought an NFT of a beanie baby sitting on a pet rock and holding a pog! i'm gonna be a fucking millionaire!

if you can make just one person laugh there's a pretty good chance that you're not very funny.

have you read maus?
i've read maus.
everybody should read maus.

seriously.

READ MAUS!

you know this whole m&m's thing? it's only marketing. you are free to share your lame ass memes about something else now. you're welcome. 

i was six years old when i learned not to say stupid shit like 'today years old'.

i haven't heard someone called a durwood kirby looking mother fucker in a long time.

happy share a MLK meme day!