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Trading for Doves
"One for sorrow, two for joy..." -- traditional counting rhyme for "black birds in a tree."
Let me find, Mr. Blick, a medium
That shows you why my heart is full of crows:
The inky oceanic wave-swells of wings in motion.
The saurian head tilt.
The barking hoarse calls full of omen and laughter and despair, half cheer, half jeer.
The swell and fall of ( Read more... ) -
Ruat Caelum
Inspired by this XKCD. Because obviously, the backstory of this strip is a romance between a stargazing monk and the queen of Faerie. Tune is almost certainly subconsciously plagiarized.
I met a mortal monk,
Bearing books, glass, and charts,
And we talked until dawn,
Watching heaven's bright arts,
He thought me a mere dream,
A fancy of air,
But next night ( Read more... ) -
Duct Tape, Sex, and Booze (This Bitch Sings of Calontir)
(Tune is probably, once again, subconsciously plagiarized -- although it came from legitimate work on my part: if you listen, you can hear the bones of Owen Alun's "Hairy, Scary," the theme song from "Underdog," and "The Number Nine Coal" rattling around in there. Song sprung from a random comment by Chesey. I feel like just about everyone's going ( Read more... ) -
My Calontiri Bard
Original: "My Pretty Irish Girl." Look up the original if you want to see Sean Connery lip-synching a Disney song and being a semi-swoonworthy version of Xander Harris doing it.
Male and enbee version forthcoming. Probably. Look, this one is for Tali.
"My Calontiri Bard"
Have you ever seen the noon sun
A-fryin' folks at Lilies?
Where Three Rivers meet, ( Read more... ) -
Always Welcome at Bardic
I know it's been done, but the image of a terrible Lovecraft-based B-movie of Internet meeting participants dying gruesomely one by one by means [sigh] remote, eldritch and squamous-adjacent amuses me. Apologies to all I mangle, especially Sir Erich's name. If I missed you and you wish to volunteer, please speak up! I can kill you gud!
(Tune: " ( Read more... ) -
Of Cabbages
It may be ambitious of me to want to sing two songs; my body has decided it's discovered the novel coronavirus, which apparently disguises itself as innocent-looking joints, plus a power outage, means I'd missed most of the last three weeks' offerings. But hope springs surprises upon the unwary.
There are actually lyrics to this out there on the ( Read more... ) -
"Star Lover"
Like other songs I've posted for Bardic Zoom, this is just so very difficult to find lyrics for on the Internet! Although "Marshall Don't 'Low" was mine, and so is "Does Dragon Taste Better?", even though several people swear they've heard both of them before. Sometimes art is so natural, it feels like plagiarism.
The Three Rivers Bardic an open ( Read more... ) -
"Do Dragons Taste Better?" (Friday night filk)
A dragon came out to our village last fall,
It seems the nearest town had no virgins at all,
He said he’d be most puissant but powerfully sweet,
If we’d only supply him with virgins to eat.
When treating with dragons, well, what can you do?
If you’re flamm- or inflammable, you’re mostly screwed,
So we shamefully caved in, but don’t you be vexed,
For the ( Read more... ) -
Marshall Don't Allow
Tune is "Mama Don't Allow," https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QqmGJcGZhZU
Marshall don’t ‘low no rhino-hiding round here,
Marshall don’t ‘low no rhino-hiding round here,
Well, we don’t care what Marshall don’t allow,
That was broken when I got here, anyhow,
Marshall don’t ‘low no rhino-hiding round here.
Marshall don’t ‘low no ankle shots round here,
( Read more... ) -
If you take nothing else away from dealing with me
Listen when I tell you this ( Read more... )