I want my life back. I want my self back.

I really need to explain to myself how my life became a bad movie in just one month, but I'm too sleepy.

On a positive note, I have A LOT of awesome new friends.

I have trouble identifying my emotions and expressing them appropriately ( Read more... )

Every experience is beautiful and painful and I was so happy walking home that I threw my arms up so I could attempt some physical representation of inner joy and a hawk flew overhead.

I feel like a weaker version of me. A crumbling building kept from tumbling by a series of supports that must not be removed. Two years ago people could not like me and it would be ok. But right now I'm hollowed out, surrounded in scaffolding while I rebuild around the remnants of my personality. I feel like I've forgotten what I enjoy, what I' ( Read more... )

I'm gonna try hard to make this a positive thing. I really feel so tired out from having been as strong as I could be for so long. It wasn't strong the way I want to be, it was just out of necessity and I actually feel really weakened at this point in my life. I can't be said about bullshit right now. So I'm not going to sit around worrying, I' ( Read more... )

ugh. I am an idiot. I think starting now I am gonna go the Christina Mayer route and not drink alcohol at all anymore.

God, I only got about two hours of sleep last night, but that was a lot of fun.

holy god the boss made me do accounting today. what is WRONG with her?

I think I accidentally had a sort of date last night. It was pretty fun.