So I woke up about an hour ago. And now I'm fully awake and refreshed. I might not even worry about a shower today because I took one just before I went to bed. But then again. I might decide it would be a good idea anyway ( Read more... )

So I never did go to work monday. They never called to tell me where to go. So I called in again today. And told them I am available for work. Hopefully I will get a job call today so I can go make a little bit of money. Then there is the recurring angry fear that I have lost my chances getting a real job because my phone was out of service for a ( Read more... )

So you know. If someone has a problem with things. And they seem pretty sane. Still, how can it all be in their heads and they can do it for zero reason at all? I don't care who it is. And even if they are insane. More than likely they have a reason to have a fucking problem with something. And if to them it's becoming a big burden. Then they can ( Read more... )

I'm gonna start working today and that is gross. It wouldn't be so bad if I had a real job. But no, I work with a stupid company that gets me jobs. Day to day jobs. So basically I have to sit and wait for a call to go somewhere I have no idea even exists. And then they get to tell me what they want me to do for eight hours. This is so grand. At ( Read more... )

I've been smoking weed lately. I know I shouldn't be. But for some reason, when it's around I can't help but say okay. But it's scaring me because I'm trying to get a job. And I have a job lining itself up. Hopefully. What if they give me a piss test and I fail it? What do I do then? The job I've been trying to get for so long is going to go down ( Read more... )

Have you ever had a dream that hurt so bad that you woke up hating a person? And to think worse, the person you love more than anything in the world. It only lasts until you realize whats going on. But to think. You hated them and possibly wished they were never in your life because of a dream for a brief moment in time. How discusting. How could ( Read more... )

I love adventures with Kirsten! Yesterday she came down to Rochester to come get me and she stayed with me! We got drunk and had alot of fun. And then we ended up crashing at my parents house. Which was really really weird. I slept on a reclining chair and she slept on the couch. Then in the morning when my parents woke up we jumped into my moms ( Read more... )

Never can people vent about happyness. Only sadness. That or... maybe there is no happyness. And there is only sadness to vent. I have failed. Completely. And miserably. I can see it. Please just end the suffering. As is known. I cannot.

Wow. You know what? Fuck it. Fuck you. And fuck it. I don't give a flying fuck. I do not care. My god. FUCK that. FUCK that. Yes. FUCK. THAT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

It is... such a very mad world. And it's true. I don't want to admit it. But it is true. Everyone I see... they are all the same to me. Even the new people I meet. They are as dead to my imagination as the last person I met. No matter what I do. I go nowhere. I can get up as bright and early and race life to the very finish. And I still go nowhere ( Read more... )