i miss him. last night Frida and i came up with a spectacular present, very creative, very sentimental. a gold fish with a card, inside the card i will write "your heart is a river, that flows from your chest through every organ, and you brain is a damn, and i am the the fish who cant reach the core." and im also going to get him a beautiful ( Read more... )

>>>like a fool i let my soul to love<<<

yesterday was quiet fun. First molly and i went to gasworks park and had a yummy picnic (she is a good date). then we walked to the fremont fair and chilled. i swear we walked a million miles it was horrible. we got face masks and ate icecream. wanted to buy a pipe but im just gonna wait til hempfest ( Read more... )

im back and im not quiet sure that its a good thing. Rehab was an eye opening experience and i feel and hope that i have grown tremendously. I look at my life completely differently and i know that im going to have to make some choices that i dont want to make but if i dont make them i will die as a result of this disease. and yes it is a disease. ( Read more... )

its still hard to believe that it takes an event like friday and me almost dying to make me realize i cant live like this. it also shows me who my true friends are, and sadly i only seem to have one. Now i have to get better and hope to god i never have to go through the pain and hell i went through friday night. i was so close to death and i ( Read more... )

thank you shayla for talking to me and helping me realize somethings about the world didnt go to six period again, got bubble tea and smoked a million cigarettes. gave a special someone a rose, not like he would ever like me or that i want to deal with boys right now. greenlake with the girls was an adventure, wished i could have wrote someones ( Read more... )

he fucking dropped me off at the end of my street, he couldnt drive the fucking extra block to my house. im soo fucking done with dickhead boyfriends. it would be a completely different story if it wasnt 10 and if i wasnt his fucking girlfriend. Im sooo fucking mad i dont know if i want to cry or scream right now. maybe its just me but i think i ( Read more... )

this weekend was a lot of fun. on Friday night molly and i got loaded and took a bunch of pictures of me that are very revealing....haha and then i asked her to slap me because i couldnt feel anything and we ended up slapping eachother for like 2 minutes and laughing hysterically. dont drink kids you do stupid things. then on saturday marney ( Read more... )

what the hell is wrong with me? cant i just make up my damn mind and stop being so...FICKLE! this week went by really fast and the whole testing thing is such a bitch oh my god i fucking hate it. at least next week i get to start at 9:45 bitch! im soo excited to be able to sleep in, i might even go for a jog. speakin of jog i really need to get ( Read more... )

i dont even know what to feel right now....im happy that im with cody, im scared that im going to get in trouble, im high and drunk on a bunch of shit. well it doesnt really matter, he is going to help me i can tell and i want to get better. i want to be good for him i really really really do. ahh....i dont even know...<3