"i'm just not ready for a relationship"
what a bitch.
she totally led me on.
now's the part where i feel like a total fool for having fallen for her. where i regret giving in. where i wish i had never gotten involved. it seems my lonely year continues. i can bare no girls... but these ups and downs are killing me.

It begins as soon as she leaves. She walks away into the rain and I immediately regret letting her leave without saying it; without her knowing it. I return to my room in the grey rain and I smell her as I walk through the door. The room feels empty without her. My bed feels too big for me. Under the covers, the room looks so big. I wish she were ( Read more... )

today was the best day i've had since i've been here... in fact, it rivals some really good days this past summer. story time everyone ( Read more... )

i kicked ass on my first test in college. French, 94%, oui ( Read more... )

Ivan wouldn’t listen but the smothering landscape calmed him more than the drugs. The train hurled fast through the countryside and the green rolling hills seemed to loop higher and higher beyond the window sill. The trees melted past, their branches clinging back and slurping across the window with a rushing spinning motion. Coughing and hacking ( Read more... )

so ( Read more... )

bang! i'm running around like mad crazy. three girls between three meals in one day. 2 out of 3 were keepers. school has picked up the pace too... i guess they were just waiting for the drop/add deadline to pass. Lots of college reading with the same old vices from high school... study or play, hm ( Read more... )

I sat rubbing my eyes and trying to stay awake. The yellow trailer school room was stale and odorless. The French teacher approached the board and began to write with a blue marker. I wasn’t sure whether to call him Monsieur or to wait until I learned the word for professor. The girl to my left sucked her teeth and played with her necklace. She ( Read more... )

that bitch finally admitted it. She finally admitted that she never loved me. Part of me can let it go now. Now that I have the truth from the devil’s mouth. I’ve hated her for so long. She finally said that she never loved me. And I know now for a fact that she was lying all those times. I can replay them back in my head a thousand times, all ( Read more... )

so the guy who was supposed to "hook me up" with the local party scene hasn't called me in a week. i heard that he went out last night with some other guys from our work... i guess i just slipped his mind... and i have mixed feelings about that i guess are worth writing down ( Read more... )