Hey! It’s been awhile since I’ve done one of these, and not for lack of material, but this one is SO idiotic, I just had to share ( Read more... )

I was sitting at my desk in lab the other day when I felt my chair getting jiggled around. Who the hell is shaking my chair?? I’m trying to work here! I whipped around to see…nobody there. But the water in the fish tank was sloshing back and forth. A quick glance at my shelf of solutions also showed the liquid bouncing around. It was a very ( Read more... )

I remember Lil and I once discussed our “short lists” a long time ago. “I don’t think I could date anyone dumb,” she said. And I hedged a bit, saying that that probably shouldn’t matter so much as to be on a SHORT list. My parents basically raised me to believe that humility was the single most important character trait I could possess, sometimes ( Read more... )

It’s a cliché, I know it is. But I’m dating a hot doctor (speaking of the type to bring home to impress your mother). And I’m not talking hot by Jasmine standards, I’m talking hot by like, ANYONE’S standards. As loathe as I am to admit it, I confess to having a “type.” It never feels conscious, and yet with one exception, all of my committed ( Read more... )

Isn’t there a certain desire to bring home somebody you know Mom can’t help but be biased to love? Or is that just me, and my parent-pleasing ways, with a mother who hates it when I have boyfriends? So when the Fish Sauce Friend messaged me I scanned his profile with mild interest until I got to the last line, squeezed right in there at the very ( Read more... )

Okay, technically he’s a square dancer, but that just sounds dweeby and contra dancing is clearly way more awesome, and we went contra dancing for our second date, so that’s what I’m going with. I think he was also totally unprepared for me to out-nerd him when I asked about his Memorial Day weekend and he said, “Yeah, I got together with some ( Read more... )

Me: Looking in this microscope is making me woozy ( Read more... )

I have a wee bit of a confession to make. After five whole dates with Wisconsin Guy, we had yet to kiss…WITH TONGUE. Remember my whole wait at least three dates before sex rule? But this? This just BAFFLED ME. At first I was all, what the shit is this? Do people actually still kiss WITHOUT tongue?? Does he even like me? Why does he keep asking me ( Read more... )

I think this is an interesting lesson in the importance of second dates, of which I had very few the first go-around because I like to make snap judgments and such. Also it means taking fewer phone calls. Because let’s sum up first date impressions: Tallstack? Yeah, I enjoyed him a lot as a person but wasn’t feeling much in the chemistry department ( Read more... )

Every once in a rare while, usually after my eyes have glazed over from staring at so many mediocre similar profiles, one just pops out and there is only one word that comes to mind: perfect. He lists his attributes as “having most of his teeth” and “no discernible limp,” while claiming his latest enjoyable read was the instructions on the back of ( Read more... )