I just wrote a private facebook post for my eyes only:
My feelings tonight are similar to that of a surrogate mother upon hospital discharge. After spending these last 3 days with the babies, my house/life feels empty.
It's taken so long to be able to approach livejournal with my recent life course. I have been in such emotional limbo. Trying to sort ( Read more... )

Sometimes I wonder, "Whaaaat am I doing???" Is it really possible to be rebounding after being single for 3 years? I just saw a picture on facebook of Dan with his family at his cousin's wedding - all of his siblings with their significant others - and I thought, I should be in that picture. I am the only thing that's missing. One of my co-workers ( Read more... )

Back from Vegas! What an amazing weekend. I am pretty sure I now have a penny slot addiction. I still hear the sound reverberating in my head. I can't wait to go back ( Read more... )

The best thing about not being scheduled on a Thursday is having Dan over for Futurama. Thwarted due to illness. The cough is now chestal and rattle-y. I think I made both of those words up. But, being both accurate and descriptive, I deem them appropriate. More nasally congested and cough is more productive. All of these facts lead me to believe ( Read more... )

I wish someone could read my brain and tell me how I feel. Where are my gypsy ancestors when I need them ( Read more... )

I am being treated for Whooping Cough. I hate it. I can't work. I am stuck home. I am constantly suppressing a cough and when I do give in, it lasts for about 10 minutes. I miss work ( Read more... )

I think I need to be quieter. 2 different people, in 2 separate cities, under 2 completely separate circumstances, within the past 2 weeks have asked me to lower my voice. I am blind and deaf. Bummer. But you know what! I disagree. (Partially) I mean, I probably was yelling, but come on - this is why I DON'T go to clubs. Its like a joke - it's like ( Read more... )

I bought tickets to see Tracy Morgan on Friday. My desire is to have Dan come with me. I figure, if I already have the tickets then he has to go. I realize I am slightly insane.
Dan's and my relationship is like prodromal labor. Sometimes I wonder if I am subconsciously preventing it from moving upwards. I have become so accustomed to this interim ( Read more... )

I just wanna love him. I am so torn between whether this is right or wrong, productive or frivolous. He says next year may be his silver lining year. 2011 might be happy year. This is the first time he's ever given even a vague time line. All I wanna do is love him. I wish I could make him see how pure this love is. I don't know how else to be. I ( Read more... )

Dan and I watched Wall-E the other night. What an amazing parallel to our relationship! I am Wall-E and he is Eva and that sweet bug is my Braxton. I am so sweetly and innocently in love with Dan despite all of his directives and I will just continue to follow him around until he gives in and becomes mine. Then we can hold hands. Eeeeeevvaaaa. ( Read more... )