note to self: keep emotions in check.
 

"The clowns do not laugh when the curtains close. Their faces do not preserve, their inane grins, those they put on for shows. If you spied, you would see them throw their blue toupees to the ground and stomp on them, their teeth biting, gummy lips till they bleed. Their eyes, red, not by paint but by tear induced blood. They fight like beasts and ( Read more... )

feeling angry is like rocking a chair.
gives you something to do but gets you nowhere.

i keep getting greedy.

"Sometimes fate is like a small sandstorm that keeps changing directions. You change direction but the sandstorm chases you. You turn again, but the storm adjusts. Over and over you play this out, like some ominous dance with death just before dawn. Why? Because this storm isn't something that blew in from far away, something that has nothing to do ( Read more... )

its not suppose to be like that. you said you are upset and disappointed, but did it even occur to you that we are equally upset and disappointed as well? yes, you may be upset by the way we handled the situation, but everyone handle things differently. yes, you might handle it in a calm way, but you cant expect everyone to handle things in your ( Read more... )

i dont know why im all emo-y tonight. its like i cry at almost eveything. at times like this i feel useless, because i can only listen and do nothing. and apparently, nothing is ever considered good enough. i should be a whole lot more less dependent i guess. nobody will be here 24/7 for you; i need to get this into my head. its time i need to ( Read more... )

So what can I do now?" she spoke up a minute later.
"Nothing," I said. "Just think about what comes before words. You owe that to the dead.As time goes on, you'll understand. What lasts, lasts; what doesn't, doesn't. Time solves most things. And what time can't solve, you have to solve yourself. Is that too much to ask?"
"A little," she said, ( Read more... )

im an angry person tonight i dont want this i dont want this why is my tolerance level so lowwwwww tonight? tell me its my mood swings that im behaving like that because i just snap at everyone and i dont want this to happen. i just dont feel like talking tonight i hope things will get better tomorrow. my life is in a huge mess. well maybe its just ( Read more... )

how can anyone be this stupid, seriously?
i can never forgive myself.