the lion and his former subjects (004)

[thelionraines]

[Private to the Aesopeans]

I hope to hell none of you are involved in any of this Jack The Ripper/dead cat/traumatizing people because it's apparently funny shit that the Europeans and Moderns have gone and gotten themselves into.

We're better than that, and Noah doesn't need the fucking headache.

Comments

[boredly]

Whoa. I can honestly say I'd never do something like that. Whatever happened to killing people with kindness?

[thelionraines]

And as we all know, coming from you, honestly means a lot.

I think killing with kindness fell out of fashion around 1914, though it was never exactly popular, as I recall.

[boredly]

I guess I'm just a little old-fashioned.

[thelionraines]

In this case, that's not a bad thing.

Aesopians

[neigh_sayer]

WHAT?!?!

Someone killed a cat??? Who killed a cat?!

[pause while she flips back a few pages]

Oh dear god. Poor Gabe...That is seriously fucked up.

[thelionraines]

Yes, it is.

Good to know you aren't involved, Luna.

[neigh_sayer]

Christ on a bike with training wheels! Why would I ever do such a thing? That poor cat... Those poor boys...

[thelionraines]

You wouldn't, Lu. We all know that. I just meant I'm glad you're not in the middle of it all.

Aesopians

[aesops_horse]

I don't know if you remember or not, but I was the chief investigator on the Jack the Ripper case - Donald Swanson. (Adam, I know YOU remember dear ol' Don, right?) I was pretty certain then that the Ripper was not an Aesopian, though he WAS a Tale and tended to prey on other Tales.

We can count the Moderns out, obviously. That still leaves a lot of people it could be.

I say we need to start taking a more active role in this shit beautiful mess that is Taledom. If they're incapable of policing themselves, and the Librarians can't handle it (no offense Noah), who else is there?

[thelionraines]

Ah yes, dear ol' Don. We He and the Keenans crossed paths once or twice, didn't they?

... you're not going to try and give the "Stop breaking the law, it's not that hard" speech again, are you? You know it never works.

[Private to Morgan]
Between us, sometimes I think we could have avoided a lot of this if one of us had had the foresight to keep the Brothers' Grimm from putting pen to paper. The Germans have some pretty fucked up tales, and some of their reincarnations aren't much better.

[aesops_horse]

Yes, I remember the Keenans - with great fondness for their absence. I like you better this time around.

And I ALWAYS give that speech, as ineffective as it is.

[Private to Adam]
No kidding - they're frequently more trouble than they're worth. Then again, in a hundred years or so we're going to start seeing Jedis, Tolkien elves and Harry Potter characters ... fun times are ahead.

[thelionraines]

Shit, you're not still pissed I was better looking, are you? That mustache did you no favors.

[Private to Morgan]
Star Wars? Harry Potter? Tolkien? Count me out the moment that starts happening.

Adam.

[lamblet]

It was Rose. That stupid, no good, little witch.

I hate her! She's rude and evil and mean for no reason, especially to Harri. Why does everyone pick on him? He isn't doing anything bad but everyone takes jabs at him. People even encourage Rose to constantly pick on him. Why can't everyone just get along?

Renee.

[thelionraines]

I'm not surprised.

[pause as Adam figures out the best way to explain why]

People pick on Harrison because he's easy to pick on. He's kind of vulnerable on his own and doesn't like conflict, which ironically makes him a magnet for it. You know the saying "might makes right", well, bullies tend to believe that. But they're also cowards at heart, so they don't dare go after anyone they don't already think they can successfully intimidate. That's why they go after Harrison and others like him. Because it's easy and it makes them feel powerful.

As stupid as we know it is, you have to remember that none of the other Tales have had as much time to make mistakes as we have. Sooner or later they'll realize it's just not worth it.

[hip_hopper]

Dude.

[thelionraines]

I know.