It's just come to my attention that Freddy Got Fingered (perennial contender for GFOAT) only received 10% fresh on rottentomatoes.com with an average rating of 2.7 out of 10 ( Read more... )

I turned the corner to see dickhole girl looking intently upon her phone, with her foot casually lying across the chair opposite her (the chair being the most logical destination for myself, were I to join her). I recognized this immediately as vaginal posturing. I’ve talked in the past about wanting to be hit in the stomach while walking to school ( Read more... )

"hehehe. I heard u monologuing earlier about this guy not fulfilling your media born expectations, so i couldn't help but help ya out... charrrrlllly"

"Ok. that was the worst desmond/claire impression I've ever heard. The fact that I can't determine which you were going for is a testament to this."

I walked over to her. "get up this instant sarah," I ( Read more... )

Who was watching price is right with me a couple weeks ago, when drew carey was hosting, and we were laughing because he had no excitement whatsoever in his voice. This girl guessed the wrong number on the final number for a car. And he's like "oh shucks. That stinks. Good playing" and just moved on. Anyway. i just got this from bill the faggot ( Read more... )

My text conversation from a few minutes ago...

Random #: "Hi is this madison ?"

Me: "Yes"

Random #: "This is jay just talked on live links"

Me: "Hey ya big cutie"

Random #: "Hey so did u have a pic?"

Me: "Yes. Here ill send you one."

Me:
( Read more... )

the chance that none of my poetry will ever be published in the Ivory Tower ( Read more... )

Click to view

I have waited to see something like this.

(warning: 23% chance this is porn.)

http://tinyurl.com/5vuz9m

i lol'd pretty hard at 3:27.

1. Above the Rim ( Read more... )

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