"You cannot create peace without paying a robot to throw people into an active volcano."

It's Christmas time in Hollis Queens
Mom's cooking chicken and collard greens
Rice and stuffing, macaroni and cheese
And Santa put gifts under Christmas trees

A DREAM: A band of 'Ocean's 11'-style thieves were breaking into a safe by drilling through a painting rather than the traditional swinging it open on hinges, and when they got through the painting, a rigged gun blasts the lead driller killing him instantly. Rather than acting surprised, the gang acts as though this was expected and the driller was ( Read more... )

Your position has been usurped.

HOPE EVERYONE is having a good holiday week, getting ready to knock back some eggnog and bourbon. The Mattrixx is spending it in the slaveshop working it to the bone. I'll be heading to Centennial after work on Friday, however.

THE SHOPPING IS DONE after a brief jaunt to some independent stores in Old Town. I ( Read more... )

By the by, everone here at the office is eschewing actual work in an attempt to beat the 1000 point record in the Penguin Whack.

"Will Advertising Rep #19 please dial the switchboard, Advertising Rep #19 please dial the switchboard."

THEY DON'T EVEN know our names anymore.

"Great job graphics artist #671."

"Keep it up Sportswriter #515."

This is Word Clerk #7 signing out.

We can't even get cable TV in Ridgemont and you want a relationship?

I ALWAYS THOUGHT that quote kind of odd, since Ridgemont seems like a bustling modern suburb, even in 1983.

HERE IT IS, a post from home on my new birthday computer. It's going to be brief, as work beckons in five. A couple of guys from Comcast came out this morning. The window ( Read more... )

WOULDN'T IT BE GREAT to be born on September 8, 1977, the day they had some kind of international video-tape piracy law agreement? You'd see your birthday everytime you put in a DVD. More importantly, after you pointed it out, other people would see your birthday everytime they put in a DVD and, in theory, always remember you in a timely fashion ( Read more... )

On the boulevard of broken dreams.

WASTING FOOD isn't my thing so yesterday I cooked up my remaining red and green bell peppers and dumped them on a pan of stuffing I brought home from work last week and ate with the remainder of a bottle of KC Masterpiece. It was above edible, but far below delicious.

IN A 'SHINING' TRADE with The Griffin's S.O ( Read more... )

His whole life revolves around Superman and cereal. .

SEINFELD would love this place.