I want to ask him but, I don't want to know the answer ( Read more... )

I'm upset. I'm upset and I'm crying and the only thing I can do is write. I wont say why because it's wrong. It is wrong to feel this way. And I strongly believe that I'm going to die alone. Alone and unhappy. Keith used to tell me he had always felt that he was going to die at a young age. I always found this amazing because I've always felt ( Read more... )

I'm stuck.
With that which is love.
And I'm trying to decipher...
Right from wrong...
Love from hate.
But it's getting harder
To identify
The expectations of the past.
And I'm sinking deep.
And I'm sinking fast.
Into that which is unacceptable.

I don't believe in love. I've reasoned that it's an unattainable state of being one strives for or believes in just for the sake of looking forward to tomorrow...like heaven. A myth. A lie. A false hope.
And God...am...I...hoping.
:-(

Lately, I have been pretty much miserable. I'm not sure why...exactly. It's almost as if I wont let myself enjoy the pleasures of life ( Read more... )

i believe in medication and i believe in therapy ( Read more... )

Still haven't spoke to my father.
Matt asked me out.
Mom sent a pic of my brother.
I said yes.
Looks just like me.
Grandmas leaving Sunday.
I'm making apartment arrangements.
Proms nearing.
High. schools. almost. over.

Greed ( Read more... )

Is it absurd to believe that one can only love once? Love is unconditional. Love is devotion. Love is eternal. Love. Love. Love. Unbelievable, utter, adoration. Infatuation. Can one love another? Can one fall in love yet again…? Or does their heart remain true despite their conscious desire to move on? One certainly cannot dismiss ( Read more... )

I am tired ( Read more... )