Wowzers, what kind of kidnappers are you, anyway? I read books, you know, I know how this is supposed to work. I should be tied up in a closet somewhere, not walking around willy-nilly! Didn't you even post any guards? Gosh darn it, I could do a better kidnapping in my sleep!
That tears it! Mr. Kidnapper Leader Guy, it's obvious that you're running
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