life is so inconsistent.

i feel like every 10 minutes left switches with right and up becomes down or down becomes up.

i wanna sleep and never dream again.

well, things are somewhat better now. we are kinda sorta making it work, wi'll see what happens. i don't wanna get kicked in the nuts anymore but i truly don't wanna give up on the one thing that makes me smile ( Read more... )

the past 24 hours have been SHIT ( Read more... )

i feel like people don't want to talk to me anymore.

i don't know what i've done, but the people who i care about seem to pretend i don't exist.

i can see the sky turn red.

things are getting better.

things still aren't perfect or easy but they are getting better.

she got a job and is at training today, that will make a HUGE difference i think.
i've gotta go to class, but im happy and just wanted to say it

kidney infection.

100$ of medicine.

Unknown cost of followup exam next week.

Still no job.

But every time I open her door and see her, none of that matters.
I can't be happy right now, but I can't seem to stop smiling.

so, i was shopping with stephanie today. job shopping. for her. and we end up in urban outfitters, she's filling out an application and i really hope and think she can get the job....and i'm bored looking around while she fills out the paperwork....and i see 4 very familiar faces. i can't put my finger on who they are....and then.....CLICK ( Read more... )

mae was pretty much amazing.

stephanie and i are happily moving forward. i hope this all works out
time will tell

im going to go see mae tonight. i hope that will help me chill out and relax. i haven't really....done anything since i got here but sit in my room and meditate on how much i miss stephanie. hopefully this will be a good night ( Read more... )

im scared. i HATE guys hitting on you knowing that im so far away and can't do anything to counter it ( Read more... )