Today i'm in Gillingham visiting my friends Steve & Jo and their 2 yr old daughter Sasha. They are the ONLY reason to visit Gillingham...The busiest shops are Peacocks (think of a lo-brow Primark) & the Hock shops, and i heard two mothers referring to or calling their kids "Cunts". Everyones skin appears to be covered in Barnacles, the coolest, ( Read more... )

01) August 1984: Spraining my ankle when i tripped on a rabbit hole whilst on holiday in Denmark, providing me with a limp even now whenever it's cold in the morning ( Read more... )

Sorry, but it had to be said...

My mouth feels like i've had a stroke!! Still, all over now, although i was upset i didn't get a Postman Pat sticker like i used to when i was 9 ( Read more... )

Toya bought a hamster at the weekend, his name is Spoon.

I'm having a filling today.

The Joy!

How many times can you say you went for a curry with Cliff Richard's horn section ( Read more... )

Curry, Curry, Curry, CURRY!!!

Oh yeah, it's the Spread Eagle tomorrow night, i bet you can almost smell my enthusiasm ( Read more... )

soundtrack to your life

Created by killer and taken 307 times on bzoink!
opening creditsthrobbing gristle: last exitwaking upart garfunkel: bright eyesaverage dayjeff wayne's "war of the worlds"first datetheme from "steptoe & son"falling in lovethe fall: bingo master's breakoutsex scenecan: you doo rightfight scenelaibach: geburt einer nationbreakup ( Read more... )

What's with all the beards in Shoreditch. It's like a Brian Blessed convention, for fucks sake it's summer, you'll all get sweaty jowls. Please can the beards stop now?

This is nothing to do with the fact that i can't grow a decent one ;)