it's hard to believe it's been just over a year since i started writing in this journal. so many things inside of me have changed, and yet the basic fundamental core of who i am has remained. i have now come to terms with my shifts and have excepted them as part of who i am, they no longer scare me or inspire anxiety. i have a better view of what i ( Read more... )

a fun night was had last night. i spent it with the two single most charming and astonishing men, eric and dan, who has returned from washington. i got off of the longest work day in history, which was spent wondering around the store for about six hours and sitting down for about two, and checked my overloaded answering machine to find that dan ( Read more... )

http://www.newgrounds.com/portal/view/218160

http://www.newgrounds.com/portal/view/219810

just click on "watch this movie"

it's funny how my mind operates. . .well not funny so much as strange and amazing. i had all these negative and insecure thoughts these past 20 hours, partly due to something i read and let my mind draw unfounded conclusions to. i became somewhat depressed, but then after about four hours of being depressed at work, my beastly mind kicked back in ( Read more... )

well, i remember a FEW things from last night. i was driving to underground to meet up with llese and just got really really drunk off of this huge whiskey sour i concocted at home. i finally got to hollywood like an hour and a half late. no one was there and the music sucked. . .UNTIL they started playing the buzzcocks. i believe it was "what do i ( Read more... )

i find myself falling away again. i'm standing on this cliff ready to jump in and be consumed by the greatest waves of emotion ever. i actually want to this time. no fear, no worries. it doesn't really matter with who. perhaps eric, perhaps dan, perhaps dan AND marissa all at the same time. wow. . .what a trip THAT would be. i think it would be ( Read more... )

i can't stop smiling. ever since i got off the phone with him i just can't stop. i don't know why. i'm just so happy. i drove to get a hot dog and was so happy that i almost cried. laughed to no one on the way home. i love him so much and i'm overjoyed that he's finally coming home. finally my brother is coming home. i won't ever have to be alone ( Read more... )

they still bring a smile to my face, those little things that i keep locked up in the messy closet in my mind. when ever they pop up i find myself transported to times and places of years and months past. seeing a cemetery, eating a banana cream pie, hearing an ice cream truck, holding a strawberry shortcake bar, drinking steel reserve, looking at ( Read more... )

here's some pics from washington


( Read more... )

impossible ( Read more... )