Comments | thursdaynite: advice to Black sheep

thursdaynite

advice to Black sheep

Jan 22, 2005 03:00

"Promiscuity, Drugs, and Bad friends" is the sum of what my parents perceive me as these days. and unfortunately,they are way of. although that seems quite inviting and is probably the average college students life style, I am not one of those lucky bastards. Since I came to college, No random sexin', no drugs, and the limited friends i have are by ( Read more... )

Comments 13

eternitywaiting January 22 2005, 08:05:10 UTC

I went through the same thing with my father, though he thought I was doing it all in high school.

Bear in mind, I've never done drugs or even smoked a cigarette; people don't influence ME, I influence THEM; and the only person I ever slept with was the man I ended up marrying.

Parents are judgemental and distrustful. At least, 99.9% of parents are. It SEEMS like an insult to you, like you're not smart or capable enough to avoid such troubles, but it's really just an insult to THEM because it means that they didn't pay enough attention to you to KNOW that you're not that stupid. They do it because of guilt, because they think they didn't do a good enough job raising you and instilling good values in you. They need to stop pointing fingers and start trying to get to know the person you actually grew up to be.

thursdaynite January 23 2005, 18:33:45 UTC

lol i feel like such a pre-teen for writing that entry but whatever it was the truth. and yea i know what you mean...i always used to feel like they thought i was completely incapable of making wise decisions like i was brain dead or something. i understand they care and to them i will always be 3. I just gotta keep living my life i guess, and they will come around at some point.

I Feel You!! mochafrappe January 22 2005, 17:16:35 UTC

Yayne,

I know how you feel about being a "black sheep" with my grandparents because I always had to be the perfect one. Yet, I was never such in the eyes of the people much older than me in my family. After the whole "incident," my parents have said the same thing about being careful and to remain focused on academics. Your parents are looking out for you, but they have to know when to draw the line. You know, allow you some personal freedom that accompanies college. Already, I've noticed several positive changes in you that has come from the experiences of last semester. You're a more ambitious, assertive, and open person since I first met you last September. Let your parents know what you post on livejournal (or at least a version of it), and your closest friends can vouch for your "lifestyle" on campus if needed. Usually, parents never go out to destroy their kids. Hopefully, this long "comment" helped, Yayne. Take care.

Kiran

Re: I Feel You!! thursdaynite January 23 2005, 18:30:57 UTC

i dont know if i can show them, but i def. think its better to let them know whats going on with me. EVEN THOUGH ITS NOTHING BAD! I guess I have a way of shutting ppl out completely to the point where they may spend time with me, but not really know me. I should change that.

kiwikutie January 22 2005, 18:15:13 UTC

Yayne,

I can't believe that they would think such awful things about you. You are by no means anything like what they said. Yes, you do know how to go out and have fun but you don't do it all the time and when you do, you're very safe. Half of the time that we're hanging/going out you don't want to come because you have school work and other responsible things to do. Please don't let them upset you - you're one of the most dedicated and kind people that I have EVER met. I agree with Kiran, somehow (I dunno maybe lock all the other entries) show them all of the positive support that your loving friends here at BU are giving you. I know that you'll figure something out and just remember, if you ever need to talk or anything - I'm right next door and always here for you.

love always - kira

thursdaynite January 23 2005, 18:29:01 UTC

Thanx a lot. means so much to me. :)

my_band_me January 22 2005, 18:50:38 UTC

from your parents? that fucking sucks...not that u need me to tell u this, but really, i'm a little upset...

moody_godess January 22 2005, 22:45:27 UTC

hey, thanks for adding me back. :) and since i dont know ya very well yet, ill just say this ..and er..that.;)

Stay true to yourself and then the parents will come around.

but damn, that cotton idea is a great idea! wish i woulda thought of that a couple times. my parents didnt give me much crap when i went away to school, but my sister said enough for the both of them. cotton woulda been a good idea when she all but said i was a slut. *um yeah, she was very wrong*..now we is cool..but then, it was a rough ride at times.

xo