Lately I havent been as depressed. Ive been trying real hard to not think about it. I still feel ugly and unwanted, but for some reason today its just really bothering me. I thought showering would help, but i just stood there thinking about everything. I feel worse now. I feel so overwhelmed. Im so broke its not even funny. I NEED a job, but i ( Read more... )

fuck you for making me feel this way.

you know what? I give up. If he doesn't see me like that then so what? Why should I feel miserable? I just need to let it go and go about the day not thinking about it. It's only bringing me down, and Im done with being down all the fucking time ( Read more... )

i just cant get over it lol. ugly as all fucking hell.

a rats ass, thats what i dont give.

oh wait, yes i do.

why does it bother me so much? i fucking let it completely consume me. i knew i shouldnt have checked. its like well duh...what did i expect? exactly that...so fuck it. i wish. i also wish i could just eat and not undo it and be okay with it but i fucking cant do it. i just cant. i need to fix it. im not gonna spend the rest of my life miserable ( Read more... )

someone just crashed pretty bad...at least from what i heard. it just made me think....would i really want that to be me? would i really want to be the one who just lost it all. dead. you know what? i think i would.

its like...what did i do to deserve to feel this way. like what is god trying to tell me or teach me or whatever. i dont wake up wanting to feel like this. im just so sick of it. i want to ignore it but it jusdt doesnt go away. and then i ate today and just could not throw up. i gagged til it made me sick just fuck it all. im bringing everyone down ( Read more... )

im fucking sick of feeling like this. like i just wanna bedone with it all. i cant even take care of dylan. i havent evenn s=seen him in days. easter was horrible im such a fuckiing shitty mom and girlfriend fuck youn for makiing me feel so fucking ugly without even fucking realizing it. its all me fucccck n i put things into my head. he said it ( Read more... )

i really wish you hadn't said that. i cant stop replaying it in my head and it's really bugging me. i didnt get any fucking sleep cuz of that. it may not seem like a big deal to you, hell you probably dont even remember saying it, but it hurt the heck out of me. its not like you. caught me off guard. uuugggghhhhh...youre stupid and im more stupid ( Read more... )

im sorry im not what you want. thats awesome that you still got game. go get yourself someone whos more like you. you stupid mother fucker. you have no idea how much that hurt. you had to see if you still had game???? wtf? its like fuck i get it. im sorry. thank ou for telling me all this now when im at my lowest. make me feel even more like a ( Read more... )