You'll never understand just how much youve hurt me. And you'll never care. That's just how you are. Cold hearted. They say it's better to have loved and lost than never loved at all, but in this case...if I could go back and change things...I never would've crossed your path. Youve been a waste of time. I think I actually hate you. Lesson learned.

Baby Peyton will be here anyday now...woo hoo! I actually feel excited and not too anxious. Ahhh...I cant wait to meet my little fella! Gonna be interesting to see Dylan & Addys reactions. :) :) So blessed. Thank you God!!!!!

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one depressing entry after another, im a fucking joke.

so I guess we're just gonna sit around while you drink & be your good ol' selfish self ( Read more... )

Okay, so lets see here. We're living in Lake Havasu, AZ. Been here since June 2011. Love it here. Dylan just turned 5 earlier this month. He's finally starting Kindergarten in August after 2 years of pre school. He is so flippin adorable, the things he says and does...omg lol. Addison turned 2 in January. Addy...now she's absolutely weird, but in ( Read more... )

You wanna know how I honestly feel? Like, on a somewhat serious note, ill be raw to the bone. I feel like a fucking loser. Straight out. I'm hoping that typing this out will someway or the other help me fucking deal & finally figure shit out because I don't want this life I've created for myself to continue any longer. I'm worn out on these goddamn ( Read more... )

and then i go lay next to you and hold you cuz i cant help but love you. at least you always hold me back i guess.

if you dont give a fuck, then neither do I. figure shit out on ur own. im done putting up with your ass. grow the fuck up. OPEN YOUR FUCKING EYES. im done with waiting for you to show some compassion...some fucking acknowledgement or thank you would have been nice, but you dont see it. you dont see anything. im not your bitch. i thought i was your ( Read more... )

sick of it. sick of feeling like im not good enough for him. sick of binging and purging. sick of being jealous. sick of always hoping. its very obvious when someone loves you...he doesnt and i know it, but i guess since i wish so bad that he did, i try pretend like i cant tell. maybe he LIKES me or TOLERATES me at times, but thats about as far as ( Read more... )

i dont get it. im trying to understand, but i just cant. i didnt do anything wrong.i didnt deserve all that bull shit. thanks a bunch. and i bet you anything its one of those things that we are gonna pretend never happened. you were drunk, just let it go. okay, i will, cuz i dont even want to think about it. it just pisses me off and makes my head ( Read more... )