even when i know it was my fault we broke up, i still don't think i can change who i am.
And i'm beginning to believe that i pushed away every guy in high school that might have been worth having a long term relationship with.
saaad.
i hate it when other people get to be happy without me :p

at some point in the past few years i've felt very happy with myself, with who i am, where i was going, what path i was on ( Read more... )

hiiiiiiiiiiigh hopes ive got  hiiiiiiiigh hopes
high aplpe pie in the skkkyyyyyyyyyyy hopes.

its hot in my room.
did i tell you i sleep in an attic now?
no bueno.
i want chocolate

i'm also reading memoirs of a geisha. its pretty good.

going camping tomorrow with em and levi wooo!
two nights away from everything... sounds great to me.

i forgot how amazng gary rossetto was...

i miss being held so much.
i am terrible at relationships and yet its all i crave anymore.
i just need to succeed once.

i want to marry a ferret.
they're so freaking cute, and entertaining, and they sleep curled up on my chest.
what more could a girl want?

also, its eric's birthday... what to get him... lol.
bad or good news awaits!
and i quit, yesterday was my last day.
and its todd's birthday saturday!!! omg what are we gonna do!

chris kiernan came over last night.
his cowboy persona is overwhelming.
i could barely resist.

does that sound sarcastic? cause its not.
those dimples make me melt!!!

and i can't have him even if i want to.
damn.

also, i still haven't figured out why my book is called where angels fear to tread...

dan is still in jail ( Read more... )

sooo i may have almost hooked up with one of my brothers friends a couple nights ago, but i didn't because i decided i shouldn't make a habit of hooking up with his friends. it would make all of us feel awkward ( Read more... )

i know that i love him as a friend.
i know that i enjoy hanging out with him.
that i think hes funny, nice, smart,
and i really think he cares about me.
but do i want him because of those things,
or because i can't have him?