We got lucky. I mean, we REALLY got lucky. We packed enough provisions for seven days and evacuated this shack made of wood. Friday morning, we moved our belongings (just the stuff that we can't live without - except for my piano) into my old room in my parents' house. And there we stayed for two-and-a-half days. My dad's uncle, his wife and their ( Read more... )

Here she comes. Lady Luck. She'll make landfall sometime on Friday. Tim is boarding up the house, and I'm gathering the kids' stuff. Disposable diapers for them for a couple of weeks until water becomes accessable again. Lots of Peanut butter. Powerade. Sunblock. Mosquito repellant.

Now, the spoiled snots of South Florida are going to have to ( Read more... )

A father of a Marine in Hollywood set a government SUV on fire after hearing that his Marine son was killed in Iraq. He burned himself and was sent to the hospital. The City of Hollywood and the US Government agreed not to press charges against this man on account that learning of his kids' death was punishment enough. His wife was on the local ( Read more... )

It's coming. It's here ( Read more... )

I went out for a beer run last night. I was stopped at a light when I felt some lady staring at me on my right. I looked, and I thought, That looks like Michelle. The chick smiled. I'm like, That IS Michelle! So I rolled down my window, and she's all, "Hey! What's going on?" We pulled over - into the Metrorail parking garage, actually. And Kyra was ( Read more... )

You're a liar. And a hypocrite. You have always said, "Yo no miento." Bullshit. You call yourself a Catholic. You're lying right there! You're full of shit. Did you ever confess to Father Tey that you hit me in the face with a spoon? Or that you were so filled with rage that you hit me on the head with your knuckles? Or that you were so filled with ( Read more... )

Some jerk set fire to a government vehicle because he was upset that his kid was killed in Iraq. His kid was a Marine. He saw the three Marines in their Dress Blues walking up to his door. Then he went berzerk. He doused the SUV with gasoline (very expensive gasoline, mind you) and lit it up. In the process, the moron doused himself and, ( Read more... )

mom: People sometimes get into plane crashes and die.
me: Uh huh.
mom: So we're going out of the country, and if anything happens to us, we don't have a will.
me: YOU DON'T HAVE A WILL?????
mom: Well, we DO have a will. Everything will be divided between you and your brothers.
me: Oh, you mean those guys who have given you heirs.
mom: [Doesn't get ( Read more... )

I don't know how much coverage of this Hurricane thing is going on in your neck of the woods, but this thing is just HOARDING us here in SoFla! And I got sick over it. I'm serious! I got a fever and nausea and an upset stomach and even the D-word! Or maybe that was just a coincidence, but I don't think so ( Read more... )

Irak (that's how it is spelled on Tele.. Tele... how do you call it? Telemundo) won against Costa Rica (Doesn't Snow!) 2-nill. Good for them. Too bad they didn't show it on NBC. NBC has the suckiest (word?) coverage of the Olympics. They show only the American hopefuls and the same boring sports. Swimming. Gymnastics (BARF. I'm sick of seeing ( Read more... )