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I'm wondering if this journal is even relevant anymore.

sometimes you just feel like ( Read more... )

The first day back on the job reminded me of why I never liked it the first time around. Always there was a deep, visceral sense of loneliness that I could never shake. By lunch I would be looking for excuses to come down from the ceiling and make the long walk to one end of the barn and out the big doors, to the outside, to see the sun and the sky ( Read more... )

I've picked myself up out of a pool of 80 proof blood to go to my new job.
I'm gonna go through drawers and buy her white roses and dinners to keep myself alive for now.

I'm not...quite...done...yet.

Whatever it takes.

Night before last I lost 6 hours. I remember drinking one whole bottle of Jack Daniel's by myself. I remember arriving at a bar with a few other people and rubbing Mike's shaved head. Last thing I remember is a woman who once changed my diapers taking me outside and putting something up my nose in an attempt to keep me upright ( Read more... )

For the third night in a row I found myself in bed with her, our limbs intertwined, the only light in the room coming from the muted television's screen, the only sound being the low, constant ground note of the small fan at bedside punctuated rhythmically by her breathing as she slept. I didn't. My heavy, tired eyes moved slowly from the TV to the ( Read more... )

You called me after I ignored you for three hours ( Read more... )

i have faith in your ability ( Read more... )