I know it's stupid, and if anything it's only harmful to think this way, but I can't tell you how often I wish I could have the past year of my life back to do over. Given the option it would be one of the easiest decisions in my life.

I've been so stupid. So fucking stupid.

If anyone's wondering, Oneonta was great. Slingshot Dakota's set had me giddy like a little girl. A little girl who's just remembering what it's like to not hate everything anymore ( Read more... )

I'm sitting on a bench outside in a beautiful tiny town in Vermont called Poultney. It's 10:30 in the morning. This is fantastic ( Read more... )

I'm sick of so much, and going to the things and people I have to make myself feel better has been more like running into fucking brick walls ( Read more... )

everything's beating me up. I feel beat up. I feel like everything I do is trying to compensate for how run down I feel ( Read more... )

Last night two of my best friends showed real concern for me, and I responded by yelling at them. I feel really bad about that because everyone should be so lucky to have people actually looking out for them ( Read more... )

Thanksgiving's at my house this year. It used to be at my aunt's before she died ( Read more... )

Keeping up with what I said in the last entry, I really do feel like I've talked so many people through terribly sad things going on in their lives that it ends up I had no idea about it. So now that I'm living it, I feel like I'm just a big douchebag if I don't follow all of the advice I've given them no matter how difficult it is ( Read more... )

I've spent so much time trying to help people when they need it. A lot of people would call bullshit on me for saying that, and I understand that because I've been unfair to a lot of people that never deserved it. There are many however, that can vouch for all the times that I've tried my hardest to help any one of my friends at any given time when ( Read more... )

I think I quit my job today. I'm excited about it and it feels way better than I thought it would ( Read more... )