When you are frustrated, the problem is that you are frustrated...

[turil]

But when we are frustrated, we often define the problem as something else entirely, especially when others encourage us and agree with us about our complaints about external stuff that is mostly out of our control (other people's behavior and personalities and abilities

Comments

[anonymous]

Aren't most livejournals full of people's friends who listen, sympathize and give constructive advice? Lots of circular affirmations all around.

[turil]

Sometimes. But when it really matters, it seems that there is more of the unhealthy "sympathizing" of "Oh that sucks." and blaming of others "She's a bitch." than anything actually constructive.