It's been nearly nine months since my last post. It's a peculiar feeling not having the need to tap out my issues daily. EMDR has been remarkable that way. All those traumatic experiences from my past being processed finally makes the world feel like a very different place ( Read more... )

I just finished watching Darby O'Gill and the Little People while indulging on some corned beef, cabbage, and potatoes. The movie is one of two I watch every year. The second one is The Quiet Man. I watched this with my grandmother. She was a big fan of the movie. I'll see it Saturday ( Read more... )

My dreams tend to take on themes after Friday EMDR sessions. Mine has featured my mother. On the night after which seems to be a big reflective night of my therapy, I dreamt of my mother lecturing me on life. It was interesting ( Read more... )

It feels weird watching the Olympics alone. Both the summer and winter events were always big deals in my family. From within my scope of memory, we would have fun snacks and cheer on Team USA. It was an event. We would talk about it leading to the opening ceremony and then days after the closing ( Read more... )

I was told that I would dream some weird dreams related to trauma after EMDR sessions. I thought the one I record tonight from last night is worth noting. Much of that is due to the emotions that came from that dream. It's been in my thoughts all day. For years, I had dreams about people I lost that were related in a manner. I would interact with ( Read more... )

When I last journaled, I was about to start EMDR. Months later, I am still in treatment. It has been extraordinarily helpful. For starters, I no longer have PTSD. The nightmares, flashbacks, crazy vigilance, and fear are all gone. It's a weird feeling. The cause of it feels like it's in a distant past rather than seeming like something that ( Read more... )

This is the month I'm finally going to start EMDR. This is a fun process that helps one process traumatic memories, allowing them to lead much more productive lives. I have put it off for 10 years and am feeling like an idiot for doing that. I have spoken to others about their experiences, and that convinced me that it is time ( Read more... )

I was flipping through the channels and saw Hoosiers on. The only time I ever watched it was my senior year in high school for a class. I remember it pretty well ( Read more... )

Sunday nights are tough. It means that I have work in the morning. I miss having a job I love. I've also been reexamining careers again. If I had the right position, I would be thrilled with Mondays. Even still, I have to wonder if there is something better for me than my current field. Our receptionist is going through the same thing. She's not ( Read more... )

The weekend has been busy, fun, but a little disillusioning. Last night, I got invited to a game night with a few friends. We grabbed dinner, played some games, drank, and told stories. All in all, I didn't get home until 2:30 am. It's been a while since I've done that. I am happy to say that I handled way better than the others ( Read more... )