I suppose that, by now, the proverbial cat has been let out of its proverbial bag. Violet Baudelaire is indeed with child, whether you would like to believe it or not. (Sorry, Quagmire.) I am going to step up and take full responsibility for this event as well as Violet herself. She has already decided to keep the child, but does not wish to act as ( Read more... )

Well, this isn't good. This isn't good at all. What am I going to do...

Who feels like a million bucks? I definitely do. Yesterday was rather... exceptionally satisfying on oh so many levels. Things are looking up when it comes to the touchy subject of my personal life. I feel as if I should be giggling like a schoolgirl. But the Count does not giggle. Therefore! You will have to deal with me typing the dreaded symbol ( Read more... )

My New Year celebration went very well. Thanks for asking. It was rather quiet around the Carmelita for a change ( Read more... )

Would a Miss Violet Baudelaire please stop spamming my beloved creative outlet with useless spam? I would really appreciate it. kplzthx. <3

I love you, bottle of port. You're my only friend...

I'm sleepy.

Merry. Christmas. To me ( Read more... )

I just received a rather uncomforting log from the AIM... thing-y. From Fernald. I dare not speak of its contents.

Instead I shall copy and paste them here (once I figure out how) for all to see. But first I must ask how to do a... cut... thingy...

Okay! You didn't just read that. I am all-knowing because I am Count Olaf!

( The nerve. )

I don't know what to do about the Esmé-Fiona problem. A person like me needs peace and quiet in order to function, but what do I get? Nothing but bickering and the occasional violent outburst, like the one that was just brought to my attention by Esmé darling herself ( Read more... )

Ok, ok, I really have no idea where i'm going. It must be all that bad luck that the orphans have cursed me with, just wait until I get my hands on them. And that dreadful Fiona is rather unnerving, she's always making a racquet and upsetting Carmelita--how is one supposed to think, especially with the fact that we're inside of a submarine! ( Read more... )