I need advice

[unmaker]

Today, I seriously considered ending a friendship - a matter which I don't take lightly. In theory my friends are so carefully chosen that I should seldom find myself in this position. They should be rational, patient, compassionate - all the things I look for in a friend. They should, again in theory, NEVER make me feel the way I feel right now

Comments

[dragonblink]

Is there any way you could keep the friendship but somehow avoid the behavior that's the biggest problem? Like, as soon as he starts to throw his little tantrum, say "Look, I'm not really interested in talking about this right now." and change the subject? Or is this the kind of person where that wouldn't do a lick of good?

He's making you miserable. He's treating you like shit. He's using you like one of those kickboxing dummies, taking out his self-induced rages on you without giving you the courtesy of even pretending to listen to your reactions, opinions, or advice. Dude, it's not your decision. You don't get to end the friendship, because he already has. Why the hell are you hanging out with him?

[museumgirl]

I'm sorry that you are having to deal with this, especially as it seems that this is someone with whom you have along history, making the relationship and the corresponding emotions that much more complicated. I don't know that I have any advice for you, as the last time I was in a similar situation, I was so non-confrontational that I was passive aggressive and instead of dealing with my problems with the other person's behavior head-on, just stopped calling them -- and when they initiated contact, I always found an excuse not to hang out until eventually, they gave up. Not very mature, responsible, or kind. Even an inconsiderate person deserves better than that. So I guess maybe I do have advice: look deep inside yourself, see what you need, and act on it. Sometimes there is no honor in the action that is non-action.

[outofservice]

I may be a cold hearted bitch, but I say drop him like a bad habit. I know a guy like this and I cannot STAND when he shows up at a place I am because it makes me want to leave then to hear about how crappy his life is and how he 'can't' do anything to change it. ugh

so yeah, if this person wont listen to reason, then the only option you have is to get them out of your life, for your own sanity

[strange_ink]

This is an unenviable position to be in. I know - I've had to cut off friendships before. It makes you feel like an asshole and a bad friend. So, I don't say any of this lightly

[___josilyn]

I wouldn't affiliate myself with someone that when I say, "That's enough", they don't stop talking.

I think a swift kick to the neck is in order.

swift kick to the neck

[___josilyn]

I hate to advocate drugs, alcohol, violence, or insanity to anyone, but they've always worked for me.
-Hunter S. Thompson

Don't worry about that whole "assault" thing. If HST said it was OK, it's pretty much gospel.

Re: swift kick to the neck

[vengeant]

Is that actually a Hunter S. Thompson quote? Because I found the same quote from Bill Murray in "Where the Buffalo Roam"...

Re: swift kick to the neck

[strange_ink]

That movie's based on HST, actually.