I just want to sit and read. I want to do something, but I don't really know what. I get so frustrated about everything. Lots of things wear me out. I dunno but at this stage I feel really close to giving up. I just wanna give up and give in. I've said it before but it feels so palpable. It used to be a far away thought, but now it feels like a ( Read more... )

Hey I remember when this was a good journal! Hahahaha. Thank dear goodness graciousness that no one reads it.

I need pills.

"...I am very very sorry for how much is in here! :chuckle:"

I'm afraid that when I lose my mannerisms, I'll lose him. I don't want to. I liked who he was. And I miss that he once was.

...God is going to kick my butt.

I feel like crying for no good reason at the moment. I think I may be scared that I won't do my work. I can't doom myself to repeating school. I can't doom myself here. Not now ( Read more... )

Wish I'd never seen your face.

I wonder if I would be good at pool?

He flipped a coin and came up wrong. He flipped it again and it came up wrong. To his obvious dismay. Slight dismay. I feel like the tables have turned. But have they really? I don't know. But I'd like the feeling to be understood ( Read more... )

Man...I'm so bored. And yeah that's all I can think about. I didn't even gym today. I should do work but I don't want to. I like working during the week. Early. Sigh. And all I wanna do is something...and I miss the comfort of that apartment...I really really do. EFF ME ( Read more... )

I wish I had better writing skills. I almost wrote that with a Z. By mistake. But I had been thinking it ( Read more... )

Silly man. Just plain silly. Ok so my last postings have been pretty distressed. I'm not miserable here contrary to popular belief! I'm enjoying myself. Jack's the only aspect of my life that makes me wanna tear at the walls. I could just kick his little face in. I wonder if he knows this. I do want to be honest though. It was so much easier then. ( Read more... )