I would like to make a public apology for my posts on livejournal. I have said things that were detrimental to people's character and have spoken negatively about people and said hurtful and mean things. From now on, my posts will be either private or friends only, as I do not wish to cause any more harm to anyone else.

It's another absolutely beautiful day outside today. I'm going to try and go to the park or something. And Elizabeth Loftus is talking at 4pm, I'm going to try and go to that as well. And go to the meeting and meet with my kid. My birthday is on Monday and I'm going to try and get some people together for dinner. I need to call a few places though ( Read more... )

Well, Jenn came by and looked at the place and she really liked it. I think it's a go. I'm looking forward to her moving in, it will be nice to have someone else around and to come home to at night. It seems like the loneliness only really hits me first thing in the morning and late at night when I come home. The night thing is because that was the ( Read more... )

Well, it's finally official that Justin is out of my life. The pain is almost too much for me to bear at times. I feel like I have a perpetual lump in my throat that I'm constantly pushing back. I'm so sad and lonely. I've never done anything like this before. I know that I loved Justin more than I've ever loved anyone. More than Doug, Dixon, John ( Read more... )

I had a wonderful, full day today. Got a lot read out of the Big Book, attended a great movie, talked with my friend Jesse, went to class, and saw the kid I'm working with for the first time. Also got confirmation on the other new kid I'm working with and will start seeing her next week. It felt great to be working again and I'm super excited ( Read more... )

I've been reading literature ever since my post last night. God, it is unbelievable how much it's been helping me. I've come to so many realization about the whole situation I'm in right now ( Read more... )

OK, I decided to take a step back from the situation. I pulled out the list that I made with Jennifer a week ago about everything I wanted in a "perfect" guy ( Read more... )

Maybe it is just because my head is clear from all the obsessions and I can see things more clearly. Maybe without all the other crap in the way I can finally see clearly how much I love him.
Maybe it's because everyone else around me is doing it.
Maybe it's just a feeling and it will pass.

I have this sudden and overwhelming urge to get married to Justin. Something I haven't really felt since we've been together. I don't know if it has to do with being lonely and him moving out or the fact that things have gotten so much better between us since he has moved out. Or maybe it's just something about my age. But I am picturing it all and ( Read more... )

Today has been good. I went to class this morning despite my longing to skip just one time this semester. As of yesterday, I didn't have my reading done or the quiz completed that was due today, and it was the LAST thing on earth that I wanted to be working on with everything that's going on ( Read more... )