Comments | velvetmoi: I blaim nothing or no one but creation.

velvetmoi

I blaim nothing or no one but creation.

Nov 19, 2002 15:52

Ok not much to say. Doing the home life thing. Doing the work thing. Keeping everyone hooked up with the fun. Uhm, trying to keep my cool in the face of adversity. True thing is, I feel useless and hopeless. I have nothing to offer the world and my realization of how many millions have and will die and no one will know their name...doesn't help ( Read more... )

Comments 11

speciestart November 19 2002, 13:09:19 UTC

I recall feeling somewhat similar awhile ago..and I still do off and on. Do you find yourself needing change? Perhaps a different locale or something? Off subject, your icon is very cool. Been to The Castle lately? I do miss that place sometimes....

Tankies velvetmoi November 20 2002, 07:10:49 UTC

Yes I do find myself needing change. I crave excitement. As far as moving, well I believe that no matter where you go there you are. :-)
Thanks for posting with me, no I have not gone to the Castle for 6 months. I gave it up because of the temptation there. I gave it up because nothing changes there. I gave it up because I am not strong enough to resist the place. Sure I miss it, but I don't need it. You went often? I added you to my friends list, have no idea how ya found me but I am glad you did. Stay in touch and what did you do to fix your feelings? I added you to my friends list.

Re: Tankies speciestart November 30 2002, 15:22:32 UTC

Hey! I found you when you responded to someone's post in 'Goth' that I was responding to....you had sent a link to The Castle so I thought I'd say hello. I believe that person's journal has been deleted though...something about using someone else's pictures without permission or something! Anyway...how have you been lately? Sounds like you had a good time at Guavaween! I miss that, though Hollywood Boulevard has a huge block party on Halloween! I think I enjoyed Guavaween more because it's in Ybor so it has a bit more historic feel to it. As far as fixing those 'feelings'...I believe you just have to find out what makes you happy and what you find beautiful and then go for it! I know you said that as far as moving, you believe that believe that "no matter where you go there you are" and I'm sure this is true for most people, however, I was just miserable in Florida having been there all my life so moving to Los Angeles was a good thing for me. I know it's not for everyone and I'm not saying to feed your craving for adventure, ( ... )

langsam November 19 2002, 15:20:47 UTC

To me--BLAH is the same as being dead spiritually.It sounds like it's time for you to mix things up a bit and maybe do something off the beaten path of what you have planned for yourself.You may feel indifferent now--but if you add some foreign elements to the mix--a little extra ginger here or a dab of tamarind--you may come back to life.Don't allow your spirit to atrophy if you can help it.And you can help it.Follow any lead you may have.Leads from the heart.Anything that ever invoked passion--anything that you are truly good at or desire to become great at.You need to realize yourself.I highly recommend reading"Thus Spoke Zarathustra" by Nietzsche if you haven't already.We must make something better of ourselves than what we already are.Take up the painter's brush or the magician's wand and become creators.You can choose to be indifferent--or you can stand up in the face of BLAH and say no.And you have the power to make something greater of humanity than it already is.Try and be your own well-spring.You have as much to offer as ( ... )

:) velvetmoi November 20 2002, 12:50:07 UTC

I agree my spirit is sad and when I search for the answer as to why, it comes up because its overwhelmed. The world saddens me and the thought that I can do nothing to change it makes one mad. Imagine watching all you love and respect and really call good and god/goddess raped and pillaged and eaten by the cancer of modern man. Though I do imagine you see it and fight the battle in your own way.

Thank you so much for your words. You are right and writing will be a help. A good friend of mine read the foreword to my book idea. He loved it and wants to see it finished. He told me to take it up, just write and write and create a world and teach people, about themselves and the world around them, even if it is fiction.

Thank you so much and your words are taken in heed.

Once more your a ray of light in the darkness. Keep shining bright star, guide the sailors on the sea of eternity home to warm shores.

Re: :) langsam November 20 2002, 15:25:51 UTC

:):)Thanks--I strongly believe that we CAN make an impact--you will help to change the world..i don't doubt that:):)

onefrabjousday November 20 2002, 14:24:33 UTC

-huggle-

November is already the first of the suicide months. [See Oregon legislative history] Don't contribute. There are people in your life who love, like, and care about you, regardless of your actions.

Be brave. See the world for what it is, but relish that you can be apart. We're behind you.

BLAH! or BLEH! zanthraxis November 21 2002, 02:36:18 UTC

nonsense, plenty of people care about what you do...i know i do. and you CAN be a great writer. you CAN be a great philosopher (in many ways i think you're on the way there as it is already), yet things don't change overnight. humanity doesn't change overnight, and it never has. sure, there's the occasional revolution, or the singular person that affects the lives of so many, e.g. the Roosevelts, Edison, or Stalin. yet in the swirling mass of 6 billion people on this planet, it's simply hard if not impossible for one person to do everything. i have this problem alot too...actually i'm having quite a bit of it right now, where i wanna use my abilities to make great strides in the lives of others, but don't know quite how to channel that energy yet. i tried with the State Dept. a few months ago to no avail to get in as a diplomat. and now my job, although it pays up the wazoo & then some, doesn't have much more of an impact than literally keeping the lights on in peoples homes. that's not what i want, and if i stayed this way ( ... )

Re: BLAH! or BLEH! velvetmoi November 22 2002, 08:04:55 UTC

Thank you for your post. You know I count you among the noble in my life. Your points are sharp as a hunters arrowhead. You see the points I see. Maybe I am to hard on myself and humanity, but at times it seems no one else is hard enough on each other. Is it to much to ask people to realize the world they live in, take a moment and clear the fog and take a look around. The vale is thick and black that the ignorant hide in. Can you call it ignorance when they choose to hide there? Hmm, One day I will write something that makes people think I hope. One day my Eden will come true for me, if no one else. I fear so much for the people of the earth. We cattle accept so much that doesn't need to be. The way our Gov. screws us is just one.

Ok I am rambling. Much hugs and thanks to my friend.

realisticone November 23 2002, 03:12:15 UTC

I have ponderd quite a bit about your posting. The overall theme to me is your growing dissatisfaction with life all around you as well as your progress in the world as a whole ( ... )