I think I'd have a tough time dealing with someone of significantly lower intelligence. I like to think I could cope with superior intelligence, but who knows? I don't feel intellectually outclassed very often, but that might be my arrogance speaking.
I have no idea what I look for a in a long-term partner, aside from someone willing to put up with my moodiness. In the two cases where I really felt I could be a long-term partner with someone (and they had a similar feeling) it was basically a case of the Sicilian Thunderbolt. In the first case, we broke up after a period of time (mostly my fault, I think), in the second-well, reader, she married me.
Good Matchesmerlin_sleepsAugust 20 2008, 21:41:28 UTC
I would find it hard to be linked with someone who was considerably less intelligent. I think my mate is slightly brighter than I am, but it's hard to be sure. He may feel the same way in reverse. It may just be that he knows more math and physics, and I know more about languages, literature, music, and such. We lure each other into exploring new areas -- adding whole new dimensions to our lives. I don't think that would happen with someone not as bright.
Luckily, Mr. Science is also warm and kind. Of course, that could be true for someone less intelligent. What might not be true of such a person is sharing my atheistic view of the cosmos. Somehow I consider that linked with intelligence. (Here come the fisticuffs!) I know I could not spend my life with someone who believed that a god could see his every move and that there's a life after death. Those beliefs flavor everyday attitudes and choices too much for me to deal with.
I know I could not spend my life with someone who believed that a god could see his every move and that there's a life after death. Those beliefs flavor everyday attitudes and choices too much for me to deal with.
I used to think that I couldn't get along with anyone whos major beliefs weren't close to mine, but I am finding that not to be true. But then the religious people I tend to meet don't go around saying "what would Jesus do" and the differences, if they flavor everyday attitudes and choices, flavor them the same flavor as my secularly originated everyday attitudes and choices. So I find it more important that we agree on political issues, than on celestial ones.
Good questions!kickindancerAugust 20 2008, 22:26:52 UTC
That is interesting about the MHC stuff, but it makes sense----dilutes the gene pool and probably leads to children with stronger immune systems. Of course, that's no good if you need blood or organs, then your spouse is useless to you
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Re: Good questions!kickindancerAugust 21 2008, 21:25:29 UTC
Well, I can do the basics, which is all that is necessary for proper budgeting! B can do that math just fine, but since he is very disorganized, if the budgeting and bill paying were left to him, we'd have no utilities because they'd have been shut off months ago.
I suppose this is at least partly directed to me, since I am an unpartnered person
Well, only one small part of the question was just for single people, and you are not the only one. And the answer that you are not seeking a partner is at least as interesting an answer as a literal answer to the question.
The inevitable intellectual pissing matches/dominance contests would doom the relationship within a week.
Discussions of how precislely Dr. Who relates the the classics doesn't count, does it? :)
Intelligence is important, but to paraphase Heschel, "when I was younger I prized intelligence, now I look for kindness." I remember a previous girlfriend lamenting to me, "I used to think that if I was surrounded by intelligent people, everything would be fine. But smart people can be just as cruel, crueler even
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Maybe genius men aren't looking for intellectual equals in their field, but someone who is gifted in other areas that they're not. Maybe some of them are only looking for trophy wives/secretaries, although I think those kind of lopsided relationships seem more a product of an earlier era or rarified social class.
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I have no idea what I look for a in a long-term partner, aside from someone willing to put up with my moodiness. In the two cases where I really felt I could be a long-term partner with someone (and they had a similar feeling) it was basically a case of the Sicilian Thunderbolt. In the first case, we broke up after a period of time (mostly my fault, I think), in the second-well, reader, she married me.
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Luckily, Mr. Science is also warm and kind. Of course, that could be true for someone less intelligent. What might not be true of such a person is sharing my atheistic view of the cosmos. Somehow I consider that linked with intelligence. (Here come the fisticuffs!) I know I could not spend my life with someone who believed that a god could see his every move and that there's a life after death. Those beliefs flavor everyday attitudes and choices too much for me to deal with.
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I know I could not spend my life with someone who believed that a god could see his every move and that there's a life after death. Those beliefs flavor everyday attitudes and choices too much for me to deal with.
I used to think that I couldn't get along with anyone whos major beliefs weren't close to mine, but I am finding that not to be true. But then the religious people I tend to meet don't go around saying "what would Jesus do" and the differences, if they flavor everyday attitudes and choices, flavor them the same flavor as my secularly originated everyday attitudes and choices. So I find it more important that we agree on political issues, than on celestial ones.
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Wait, he is? But you're the finance person? :)
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Well, only one small part of the question was just for single people, and you are not the only one. And the answer that you are not seeking a partner is at least as interesting an answer as a literal answer to the question.
The inevitable intellectual pissing matches/dominance contests would doom the relationship within a week.
Discussions of how precislely Dr. Who relates the the classics doesn't count, does it? :)
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Maybe genius men aren't looking for intellectual equals in their field, but someone who is gifted in other areas that they're not. Maybe some of them are only looking for trophy wives/secretaries, although I think those kind of lopsided relationships seem more a product of an earlier era or rarified social class.
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Maybe genius men aren't looking for intellectual equals in their field, but someone who is gifted in other areas that they're not.
I am willing to entertain this, but I was mostly thinking of women who had no real mental gifts of any sort.
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