i think there is a reason i am here... i can feel the future coming on to me.

oh my god. i do not want to be at work. i wish life had a pause button. i would definately be on pause right now. i am tired. there is snow. normal life is overrated...

i just made the largest nitecap eva!!!! seriously....

so once again.. the fog clears and i emerge.. just a bit more tarnished from use..

im at marys right now. waiting to see if i am going to hang out with my tennage lover or if i am going to stay here. so, i am in limbo. blah. i hate limbo. even the game.

reading about other peoples real lives and the ways i have given so many people my close friends and loves makes me want to stab my stomach out. why am i never the one to end up happy? really, i'm coming to the point where i believe nothing will change this, nothing can destroy me. i am so sad.

i have returned from the bermuda triangle i have been living in. i am now homeless. yeah, i have places to stay but i no longer have a home of my own. i have yet to decide the plan for the future. i think i will continue to work on a day to day basis until i have a usable bank account again. and a more reasonable outlook on life. i have become ( Read more... )

yeah yeah. i have been doin nothing with my days as of late. and i have no rent money among other moneys i am supposed to have. good news is i have a weekly cleaning job. but i need like ten more jobs. money sucks!

new day. new fever. new migraine at the end of it all. but i did watch dirty dancing today. damn i love that movie. i just might watch it again later. you know, when i wake up at like 5pm. when the birdies awaken i know it's time for bed....

well, as i see it the 16th started my downfall into this rapid flu destruction of my body. i couldn't miss my show sat so i slept all day in order to appear around 10 and close the bar. the good news is i walked in with four bucks and walked out sufficently inebrieated. or however you spell it. whatever. then i laid in bed or on the couch until ( Read more... )