Being Seen

[virgino_orsino]

It is an odd thing for me to be seen by different audiences. Because my physical appearance is something that clearly identifies me and my gender expression, it is a never-ending adventure to experience how I will be seen next. Usually, I'm an alien. I've mentioned this before. If I'm in suburbia in particular, at best, the folks stare at me

Comments

[marrus]

You're a LESBIAN???

Holy shit! How did I miss that??

[virgino_orsino]

I know this must be ever so shocking for you. I'm sure you will cope with this revelation somehow. ;)

[virgino_orsino]

Wow. I've never gotten a "sisterhood" inquiry before. The "family" one always throws me off. There was this one woman at the PA Ren. Faire that asked me that question. I think she was hitting on me. But I was so closeted at that time and ever so naive that I really hadn't the faintest clue what was going on.

And BTW, shucks. I love being called handsome. :) Thank you.

[virgino_orsino]

Well, the first day is a two for one deal for the adults. The second day is a free kids day. Usually, the first weekend has the lightest attendance. But it also has the potential to be one of the warmer weekends. It all depends on what she prefers in weather vs. discounts. I would also say that the show will be more polished the second weekend (the first weekend of October). So, as a theater-goer, that's when I would go.

Might we see you and any of your kin at the faire?? I have a great fight with another female fighter. . .nudge, nudge

[songbirdxox]

The first time I saw you, it was in online pics from last years CTRF. I had already planned on going, but after I saw you, I had something to look forward to. A good looking butch who's a Rennie!! yay!! (Then I found out you were married. *sigh* oh well - so I am, but it's nice to dream.) As a very Femme Lesbian Rennie, I find that there aren’t many true butches at any Ren Faire. Never mind active in the faire scene itself. You were a nice surprise…and ya turned out to be pretty cool

[virgino_orsino]

It's not the queer folk don't recognize me, it's a lot of everyone else, as your wife encounters. And I don't mean just straight folks, because there are plenty of those folks who do perceive and have experience. It's just folks who don't have any frame of reference and haven't been out in the rest of the world where butch women exist. I certainly make my choice whether it's worth it to correct someone on my gender. Sometimes it is simple and very necessary. Other times, it just wouldn't help anything. But we all muddle along trying to be understood for who we are. It's not just the butch lesbians. Everyone goes through the experiences of establishing their identity and then sharing that with the world. sigh.

See you at CTRF. :)

[eliza_bennett]

interesting interaction. personally, the use of the phrase "the family" sort of reminds me of Charles Manson, but hey, if that's the phrase "Mick" likes, i guess it's her choice. :)

[virgino_orsino]

"Family" as a term for queer folk, has always felt a little weird at best and thrown me at worst. I don't really feel related as family to other queer folks. I feel a sort of kinship, but not family. It's more of being a similar breed or genus or something like that.