( Read more... )

puffing away one after another lighting up breathing in putting out repeating this all night
watching the sky to see if the sun has shadowed the moon anymore then the last minute
crying my eyes out for the mistakes i have made
the mistakes others made, no the choices they made that tore my body in two
the choices they made to hurt a innocent girl who ( Read more... )

i recently realized i have nothing great anymore
i feel like my lif eis nothing but a lie
its all gone to hell since cory died.
god what have i done.

i find myself gasping for air in this hell hole i live in. craving a cigarette, to fill my lungs with smoke shortening my life by the mili second. begging for someone to love me. wishing for the best. it never happens. its always ruined. it always fails.

transfered from my old journal... waste0230 ( Read more... )

honesty is far and few these days ( Read more... )

i am used to this feeling
it sucks
this one i really cared about
but i dont know anymore
there is a part of me where i truelly believe the one for me is in heaven
that my first love was my real love and thats all im going to get. i realize im young...
but i dont want to die searching for companionship.
i have many years but right now i just wish things ( Read more... )

So i was currently looking for sweet 1/2 gauges online so i could get an idea of what kind i want for when i go bigger. cause well thats the next step up for me. then while looking through pictures i saw the pictures for fake gauges. and well honestly it made me laugh but at the same time was super annoying. i personally dont understand why anyone ( Read more... )

so i had this converstation about pills and going off of them and what they do and etc with sara today. and this just kind of is what i think so i thought i would put it up here explaining why im getting off of them and not to mention im light weight fucking weird right now. see now dont get me wrong pills do sometimes for certain things help. but ( Read more... )

the color of her skin and the blood ran so deep
she thought the peramedics were angles
she asked them if god was on his way
the held her cut tight to try to stop the bleeding
they told her god wasnt coming if they could help it
she started to cry and realized she messed up yet another time
she couldnt even kill herself right how could she live a normal ( Read more... )