You know what? I like to think I',m pretty hot actually. Creepy guys on the internet seem to think so. So why is it that I don't have a boydfreidn? Yes there are people I know who want to shag me but it's just not the same. I want to have a proper b oyfriend. I haven't slept with a guy for almost a year and that's just sad ( Read more... )

I got a message that I'm sure is from Mr Templeton ( Read more... )

I slept with Allanah :)

Since you're sort of my pimp with this I thought I should tell you.

Alice in Wonderland was so much more fun when I wasn't pulling it apart. Contrast the role of dreams in Alice’s Adventures in Wonderland and Through the Looking-Glass..

So far my essay reads thus:

The role of dreams is unimportant. I don't care. Go away.I hate you, Children's Lit. I hate you so very much right now ( Read more... )

... Allanah?

What happened over there tonight? And Lily's on crack, right?

I just quit my job at the yacht club after one of those rich, fat bastards tried their hand at sexual assault in the storeroom ( Read more... )

Hey, this is sort of really overstepping boundaries and sort of out of the blue but... what's it like sleeping with a chick?

I suppose I could be addressing this to Austin as well, but she's busy with the Pope.

Fireball? Not a great idea indoors.

The Vatican just lost it's TV. Feel free to blame Cooper and Davis for being complete berks and breaking it.

Hey, ain't it great that we're all filling up with the disposable income and- oh, wait, no we're not. Twats! I want my telly back!

Davis you cunt! Don't you ever almost die again!

A quiz for you all. Yesterday I...

a) was offered a large sum of money to sleep with an old married man
b) posed on a million dollar yacht in a bikini in the freezing cold drizzle
or c) lost my nipple peircing to a ferret.

The answer ladies and gentlemen is all of the above. As you can see it was a busy day ( Read more... )