Asuka!
Name: Abelarda
Age: 25
Previous stamps/do you agree?
Regular application: Kapitel!Aya. I do see some similarities, although I'm generally nicer and not as vengeful and obsessive as him.
Kritiker theme: mission planner. Yes, I think it fits me quite well.
Mirror theme: Kapitel!Aya. I'm not sure... I have red hair and I wear long coats, but I think that my taste in clothes is quite different.
Song theme: Other Side of the Moon. I cannot say that I agree, but on the other hand, the theme was very intuitive and I can see this song a bit different than the voters.
Do you have a gender preference for this theme? Yes, I'd like to be matched with a man.
Do you mind being matched with a much older/younger character? No, the age doesn't matter.
How do you perceive yourself? Negatively, suprisingly for many people that barely know me. They usually mistake my pride and self-respect with assertiveness or even conceit, which is very far from truth. In fact, I am a perfectionist with very high standards - I expect a lot from people and even more from myself. So, as you can see, I really don't think too high of myself, as I'm perfectly aware of my mistakes and weaknesses. Because of that, I usually function under a lot of pressure.
How do people perceive you? From what I've heard, some say that I'm too stubborn and down-to-earth, some call me loyal and trustworthy. I asked my husband for a more detailed description. That's what he told me:
Sensitive, but not sentimental. Scrupulous. Ironic. Has strong morals, which sometimes leave her conflicted. Distrustful, keeping a distance. Pessimistic. Ambitious. Trusty. Sometimes doesn't believe in herself and her abilities. Patient and honest. Cautious. An idealistic cynic. Nervous. A loner. Sincere and straight to the point. Stubborn. Intelligent. Introverted.
What is your ideal significant other like? Not that I believe in ideals - I'm too realistic to search for my ideal significant other; I'm perfectly aware of the fact that I have to learn how to accept his flaws. But there are some things that I like in men. Basically, he should be intelligent. Strong enough to be there for me when I need him. Loyal enough to make me trust him, even if I don't trust easily. Mature, responsible, dependable. With a good sense of humour.
What traits would you not like to see in them? I can forgive many flaws. But I could not stand jealousy. I need a lot of freedom; I would never betray him, but I hate to be controlled. I would give him enough space, too: if I manage to trust someone, I am not jealous. But if he betrays me once, I'll never trust him again.
Would you prefer him/her to be more...
Extroverted or introverted? I'd prefer him to be introverted, but I don't think it would work: he probably should be a bit more extroverted than me. But not too extroverted.
Outgoing or shy? If he'd be shy, we probably never started being together; I'm introverted and usually hide my feelings. But I wouldn't feel good with someone who is very outgoing.
Conservative or all-out? Conservative, when it comes to understanding morals and values. But not conservative, when it comes to gender stereotypes.
Serious or cheerful? Serious when needed, but I'd like him to have a sense of humour, too. A sense of intelligent, abstract humour, as I don't like stupid jokes.
Controlled or impulsive? Controlled. And not as short-tempered as me.
Do you think your vision of the ideal partner matches with what your real significant other is/would be like? Well, no. My husband is loyal and dependable, that's right, but also impulsive, not very well-mannered and a bit naive. And because of that, he sometimes annoys the hell out of me. But even though he's not my ideal, we're together for a long time - ten years, married for a year and a half - and I know his weaknesses; he knows mine, too, even if he's also annoyed with them. We managed to learn how to live with all the differences between us. And, after all these years, we still want to be together.
How much time daily would you like to spend with your partner? How often would you meet? It's hard to tell, really... But not too often. It would be easier for us if he would share my concept of freedom: I'm loyal to a fault, but I need my space. I could not stand someone with me all the time. Even if we'd live together, we shouldn't do everything together...
And then? How would you like to spend your time with him/her? We should share our hobbies. A lot of talking, broadening our horizons, self-development. Also long walks, discovering new places, finding new challenges. Basically, he should be my friend; being my lover comes on a second place. Passion doesn't last forever; understanding is much more valuable.
What do you feel is the most important part of any relationship? Trust; the feeling that you can count on someone.
What does "love" mean to you? I don't believe in love in a romantic, idealistic sense. No, I'm afraid I'm way too sceptical for that. Love is not a romantic talk or a candle-lit dinner; love is full of responsibilities, it's hard, painful and sometimes leaves you very bitter. But I do believe in partnership, in love based on friendship and trust: doing something with someone, making plans, creating something together. And yes, this definition really works for me.
What do you think about gender roles in relationships? I hate labels and stereotypes, especially about the gender... A dinner, for example, should be made by the person who has enough time to do it, not by me - only because I'm a woman. It shouldn't be one-sided. And, most of all, I hate the stereotype that requires women to sacrifice themselves for the sake of their husbands. A relationship is not a slavery; it should work both ways.
Links to the open applications on which you have voted on - four/less if not available. (Votes on both theme and normal applications are acceptable but you can't use the same ones you used for your previous application.)
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