Just tell me what I need to do to be truly and finally satisfied, to shut down the static in my spine and finally disipate this cancerous nervous energy. I'm sick of the codes. I need theophany. I need overt glaring trumpetting undeniable objective experience. I need your holy fucking voice to spell this shit out for me.

( Parenthetical Girls - The Pornographer )

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Everything that happens on this planet seems to be only for breaking human hearts ( Read more... )

"I think that somehow it's been burned into my brain that if something doesn't come easily, voluntarily, naturally, then it isn't real, or doesn't have real worth; that if you have to exert force, you're acting against nature. I think that in all seriousness, this is the map of my moral geography."

I'm thankful that I'm alive, really, I really am, but I'm also really very amazed that I've been able to keep it up this long. Being alive that is ( Read more... )

A voice in the cave, but of course, my symptoms can't escape me forever. The powerful impulse of exhibition.

I'm so tired of stifling impulses. It's so hard. I don't need an audience, I tell myself.

i can feel the wave form collapsing. every second. i can free i am free i am free. or so i tell myself. or so god tells me. but for the chains we forge for ourselves. why is it so hard to believe?

what kind of god would create creatures capable of such boundless and transcendent emotions, such as love, and then wire them for social configurations that are so intrinsicly incompatible with their nature that the emotion of love can instead create conflict inside of the poor creature, and induce instead guilt, shame, fear.

"Which one is Eris ( Read more... )