Audio

[whattheytellyou]

[Friends Filter**]I need to sort a few things out, so forgive me if I ramble. Maybe a solution will present itself. Or maybe someone has some insight that would be useful

Comments

Private

[whattheytellyou]

It wasn't really an accusation of how others behave here, you know. I'm analyzing myself just as much as anyone else.

I'm thinking about leaving, like I said. I don't know if it's as bad as I think it is, or if I'm just overreacting. I...

It's as bad as I think it is. It's not healthy, and I need to help myself if I want to help Amanda.

Private

[whattheytellyou]

I think I'm engaging in dangerous behavior. It's...complicated. I'm not drinking, I'm not...taking narcotics. But it's risky behavior nonetheless, and it's not like me.

I just don't know if it's as bad as I think it is, or if I can move past it without leaving without replacing it with behavior that might be more destructive.

[private]

[scarlet_discord]

I've been tempted to drink too often because I can't sleep worth a damn lately. But I caught myself and asked for some help.

[private]

[whattheytellyou]

Wise move.

Drinking to excess can be easily fixed, if you catch it early enough. Not to suggest it's not a serious problem, of course.

Why can't you sleep?

[private]

[scarlet_discord]

To excess...not so much as "drinking to fix a problem". That part can't stay.

It's because...well...

I keep having nightmares about my death. It's apparently dead freaking normal to have some kind of nightares or flashbacks or something after that scary. But it is a bitch to go through.

[private]

[whattheytellyou]

It is difficult.

If you need someone to talk to, Wanda, you know I'm always around. Level one, room four. And it stays between us.

private

[stopthat_destro]

Yes. There are many behaviors I'd rarely engaged in before the Barge. If I knew the solution, I'd have put an end to it already.

private

[whattheytellyou]

Like what? If you don't mind me asking.

private

[stopthat_destro]

My temper is shorter, and I seek out alcohol where I used to refrain. [Not even gonna touch the V or sexual dysfunction at alllll.]

A byproduct of no longer being happy as one's self, I suppose. The Barge serves to ruin inmates before it... repairs them.

private

[whattheytellyou]

I think the Barge eats at everyone after a while, Rex.

If you need someone to talk with, you know I'm around. It'll stay between us.

[Private]

[sharpememory]

I don't know about risky behaviors. I've always been able to handle things pretty well. But sometimes I am concerned about other inmates. [This is mostly lies, Barron's been drinking a fair bit since he lost his powers. Ah, the barge.]

[Private]

[whattheytellyou]

I'm concerned about everyone here. Even if we try to pretend it doesn't have an effect on us at first, after a while...

Well.

Water balloons.

[Private]

[sharpememory]

The water balloons were an excellent idea. I'm waiting for the perfect moment to hit Arthas in the back of the head with one.

But yeah, you see it in the wardens as well after a while. Everyone seems to get ground down. Personally, I'd be more upbeat if I actually had my power, but there you go.

[Private]

[whattheytellyou]

Who's Arthas?

[jurisfictional]

I think I understand. I doubt I've been here long enough to start drinking more than I used to, but I could see something of the sort happening somewhere down the line if I'm not careful.

Do you think going home and sorting things out there will help? You'd just be returning to this cycle of hypervigilance and normalcy, as you put it. It could be that the weird shit will seem even weirder after you get back from vacation.

[whattheytellyou]

In my particular situation, I think going home would help. I'm not drinking to excess or using drugs or any other addictive behaviors, really. It's not a situation where time and distance wouldn't be advantageous. Nipping my issue in the bud, being with my friends?

Yes, I think going home would help.

[jurisfictional]

If you think it'll fix more problems than it creates, then I believe you should do it. Have you got an inmate? I can't recall.

[whattheytellyou]

That's the issue. I think it will create more problems, because my inmate is Amanda Young.

Leaving could fix the problem, and in the long run, it will be better for bother of us. But she might react badly. Staying could exacerbate the problem, but I won't be accused of abandoning her.